Parenting

Difficult Behaviours in the Classroom

2008-11-06T09:19:00.001-08:00

BEHAVIOR:

· Rambling -- wandering around and off the subject. Using far-fetched examples or analogies.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Refocus attention by restating relevant point.

· Direct questions to group that is back on the subject

· Ask how topic relates to current topic being discussed.

· Use visual aids, begin to write on board, turn on overhead projector.

· Say: "Would you summarize your main point please?" or "Are you asking...?"

BEHAVIOR:

· Shyness or Silence -- lack of participation.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Change teaching strategies from group discussion to individual written exercises or a videotape

· Give strong positive reinforcement for any contribution.

· Involve by directly asking him/her a question.

· Make eye contact.

· Appoint to be small group leader.

BEHAVIOR:

· Talkativeness -- knowing everything, manipulation, chronic whining.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Acknowledge comments made.

· Give limited time to express viewpoint or feelings, and then move on.

· Make eye contact with another participant and move toward that person.

· Give the person individual attention during breaks.

· Say: "That's an interesting point. Now let's see what other other people think."

BEHAVIOR:

· Sharpshooting -- trying to shoot you down or trip you up.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Admit that you do not know the answer and redirect the question the group or the individual who asked it.

· Acknowledge that this is a joint learning experience.

· Ignore the behavior.

BEHAVIOR:

· Heckling/Arguing -- disagreeing with everything you say; making personal attacks.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Redirect question to group or supportive individuals.

· Recognize participant's feelings and move one.

· Acknowledge positive points.

· Say: "I appreciate your comments, but I'd like to hear from others," or "It looks like we disagree."

BEHAVIOR:

· Grandstanding -- getting caught up in one's own agenda or thoughts to the detriment of other learners.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Say: "You are entitled to your opinion, belief or feelings, but now it's time we moved on to the next subject," or "Can you restate that as a question?" or "We'd like to hear more about that if there is time after the presentation."

BEHAVIOR:

· Overt Hostility/Resistance -- angry, belligerent, combative behavior.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Hostility can be a mask for fear. Reframe hostility as fear to depersonalize it.

· Respond to fear, not hostility.

· Remain calm and polite. Keep your temper in check.

· Don't disagree, but build on or around what has been said.

· Move closer to the hostile person, maintain eye contact.

· Always allow him or her a way to gracefully retreat from the confrontation.

· Say: "You seem really angry. Does anyone else feel this way?" Solicit peer pressure.

· Do not accept the premise or underlying assumption, if it is false or prejudicial, e.g., "If by "queer" you mean homosexual..."

· Allow individual to solve the problem being addressed. He or she may not be able to offer solutions and will sometimes undermine his or her own position.

· Ignore behavior.

· Talk to him or her privately during a break.

· As a last resort, privately ask the individual to leave class for the good of the group.

BEHAVIOR:

· Griping -- maybe legitimate complaining.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Point out that we can't change policy here.

· Validate his/her point.

· Indicate you'll discuss the problem with the participant privately.

· Indicate time pressure.

BEHAVIOR:

· Side Conversations -- may be related to subject or personal. Distracts group members and you.

POSSIBLE RESPONSES:

· Don't embarrass talkers.

· Ask their opinion on topic being discussed.

· Ask talkers if they would like to share their ideas.

· Casually move toward those talking.

· Make eye contact with them.

· Comment on the group (but don't look at them "one-at-a-time").

· Standing near the talkers, ask a nea-by participant a question so that the new discussion is near the talkers.

· As a last resort, stop and wait.

KEYS FOR MANAGING CHALLENGING STUDENT BEHAVIORS

· Instead of holding your students with an iron grip, allow them to be themselves until (and unless) their behavior distracts you or others in the class.

· When you notice unproductive behavior, nip it in the bud. Otherwise, you send a clear message to the students that it's OK for them to talk while you are talking, etc.

· Use classroom management techniques before you become irritated, impatient or upset. We are much more powerful when we are centered, when we like out students, and when we view our students with fondness rather than impatience.

· Allow students to save face. When we put students down in front of others, the entire class of students will turn against us.

· Do all you can to feel good about yourself and others on a daily basis. Your attitude will come across to your students, so it is important to be in good mental and physical shape.

· If, by chance, you feel that you have spoken sharply in an attempt to manager your students, own up to it. "Wow, that sounded harsh. Forgive me!"

· Remind yourself: "If teaching were easy, everyone would be doing it." Teaching in front of a classroom full of students can be challenging, but on the other hand, very rewarding!

Something that your kid's lunch box wants to convey.

2008-11-04T07:12:00.001-08:00

Something that your kid’s lunch box wants to convey…

Sandwiches on Monday

Parathas on Tuesday

Dosa on Wednesday

Noodles on Thursday…….

Puri Sabzi ....

…and the menu was neatly chalked out for the entire week on a timetable card and hung on the kitchen wall. Not actually in the habit of eating according to timetables, but listening to the spontaneous biddings of my tongue , I asked my sister-in-law, Sridevi, who managed of our family kitchen, what this predetermined timetable was all about.

“It’s the school lunch timetable for Vaibhavi that her class teacher made for her class” she conveyed. This came as a surprise to me.

“But isn’t it you and Vaibhavi who decide upon the lunch that she would be carrying to school on a particular day?” I asked

“Yeah, Leena. That was what it used to be. But her principal has ordered the entire primary school to carry the same lunch on a particular day, so that every lunch box has the same contents each day. This was done because some children ate up the lunch of others and some of them returned home hungry on that account.” said my sister-in-law.

Vaibhavi doesn’t eat much, nor is she very fussy foodwise, but I know that everyday she lovingly asks her mother to prepare an item of her liking for her lunch at school. Does this mean that she needs to have Dosa on Wednesday when she actually feels like having a cheese burger on that day?

I remember, lunchtime was so very special during our school days. The entire gang would wait for lunchtime. The clandestine party would start much before that. We would exchange lunch boxes from underneath the desk. My friends would lap up my irresistible onion uthapam and tomato chutney, and I in turn would eagerly devour some delicious khichodi from one of the boxes.

There were people from different communities both national and international in my class, and food was one of the best reasons to make friends and know about each other’s cultures. Some of the lunchbox friendships have endured the test of time and are going strong even to this day. My friendship with my best friend Arpita began with me exchanging my puri sabzi with her French toast, and even today we are the best of friends.

Not only this, the mums who prepared the best lunches were always praised and remembered by the kids.

But with this new rule of the entire primary school having to carry the same lunch, will they have much to look forward to during lunchtime? Of course, this rule ensures that no child eats another child’s lunch and no child returns home hungry. But have children of the present times become so cruel that they will leave some of their friends hungry? I don’t think so. Even if some children are engaging in such behavior, shouldn’t we as parents teach them the ever precious lesson of sharing and caring, or should we give them a lesson that encourages an ‘each to his own’ kind of a principle? The choice is ours…

Daddy

2008-10-27T07:00:00.001-07:00

HOW A SON/DAUGHTER THINKS OF HIS/HER DADDY AT DIFFERENT AGES:

At 4 Years
My daddy is great.

At 6 Years
My daddy knows everybody.

At 10 Years
My daddy is good but is short tempered

At 12 Years
My daddy was very nice to me when I was young.

At 14 Years
My daddy is getting fastidious.

At 16 Years
My daddy is not in line with the current times.

At 18 Years
My daddy is becoming increasingly cranky.

At 20 Years
Oh! Its becoming difficult to tolerate daddy. Wonder how Mother puts up with him.

At 25 Years
Daddy is objecting to everything.

At 30 Years
It's becoming difficult to manage my son. I was so scared of my father when I was young.

At 40 Years
Daddy brought me up with so much discipline. Even I should do the same.

At 45 Years
I am baffled as to how my daddy brought us up.

At 50 Years
My daddy faced so many hardships to bring us up. I am unable to manage a single son.

At 55 Years
My daddy was so far sighted and planned so many things for us. He is one of his kind and unique.

At 60 Years
My daddy is great.

Thus, it took 56 years to complete the cycle and come back to the 1st. stage. Realize the true value of your parents before its too late

Women's History month

2008-10-20T08:21:00.000-07:00

WOMEN PLS READ THIS GREAT !!!!

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO PLAN TO BE GREAT MUMS, THOSE OF YOU, WHO ARE GREAT MUMS,
THOSE WHO HAVE GREAT MUMS AND THOSE OF YOU WHO HAD GREAT MUMS...

Real Mothers don't eat quiche; they don't have time to make it.

Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils are probably in the sandbox.

Real Mothers often have sticky floors, filthy ovens and happy kids.

Real Mothers know that dried play dough doesn't come out of shag carpets.

Real Mothers don't want to know what the vacuum just sucked up.

Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?' and get their answer when a little voice says, 'Because I love you best.'

Real Mothers know that a child's growth is not measured by height or years or grade... It is marked by the progression of Mama to Mum to Mother...

4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mummy can do anything!

8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mum knows a lot! A whole lot!

12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.

14 YEARS OF AGE - Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.

16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned.

18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!

25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it.

35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mum's opinion.

45 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mum would have thought about it?

65 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mum.

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows, and the beauty of a woman with passing years only grows!

Please send this to 5 women today in celebration of Women's History Month.

If you don't, nothing bad will happen, but if you do, something good will: You will boost a Mother spirits

__._,_.___

Potato Puppy

2008-10-19T19:04:00.001-07:00

My four-year-old son, Shane, had been asking for a puppy for over a
month, but his daddy kept saying, "No dogs! A dog will dig up the
garden and chase the ducks and kill our rabbits. No dog, and that's
final!" Each night Shane prayed for a puppy, and each morning he was
disappointed when there was no puppy waiting outside.
I was peeling potatoes for dinner, and he was sitting on the floor at
my feet asking for the thousandth time, "Why won't Daddy let me have a
puppy?"
"Because they are a lot of trouble. Don't cry. Maybe Daddy will change
his mind someday," I encouraged him.
"No, he won't, and I'll never have a puppy in a million years," Shane wailed.
I looked into his dirty, tear-streaked face. How could we deny him his
one wish? So I said the words that were first spoken by Eve, "I know a
way to make Daddy change his mind."
"Really?" Shane wiped away his tears and sniffed. I handed him a potato.
"Take this and carry it with you until it turns into a puppy," I
whispered. "Never let it out of your sight for one minute. Keep it
with you all the time, and on the third day, tie a string around it
and drag it around the yard and see what happens!"
Shane grabbed the potato with both hands. "Mama, how do you make a
potato into a puppy?" He turned it over and over in his little hands.
"Shh! It's a secret!" I whispered and sent him on his way.
"Lord, you know what a woman must do to keep peace in her home!" I prayed.
Shane faithfully carried his potato around for two days; he slept with
it, bathed with it and talked to it. On the third day I said to my
husband, "We really should get a pet for Shane."
"What makes you think he needs a pet?" My husband leaned against the doorway.
"Well, he's been carrying a potato around with him for days. He calls
it Wally and says it is his pet. He sleeps with it on his pillow, and
right now he has a string tied to it and he's dragging it around the
yard," I said.
"A potato?" my husband asked and looked out the window and watched
Shane taking his potato for a walk.
"It will break his heart when the potato gets mushy and rots," I said
and started getting out food for lunch. "Besides, every time I try to
peel potatoes for dinner, Shane cries because he says I'm killing
Wally's family."
"A potato?" my husband asked. "My son has a pet potato?"
"Well," I said shrugging, "you said he couldn't have a puppy. He was
so disappointed, in his mind, he decided he had to have a pet..."
"That's crazy!" my husband said.
"Maybe you're right, but explain to me why he is dragging that potato
around the yard on a string," I said.
My husband watched our son for a few more minutes. "I'll bring home a
puppy tonight. I'll stop by the animal shelter after work. I guess a
puppy can't be that much trouble," he sighed. "It's better than a
potato."
That night Shane's daddy brought home a wiggling puppy and a pregnant
white cat that he took pity on while he was at the shelter.
Everyone was happy. My husband thought he'd saved his son from a
nervous breakdown. Shane had a puppy, a cat and five kittens and
believed his mother had magic powers that could change a potato into a
puppy. And I was happy because I got my potato back and cooked it for
dinner. Everything was perfect until one evening when I was cooking
dinner, Shane tugged on my dress and asked, "Mama, do you think I
could have a pony for my birthday?"
I looked into his sweet little face and said, "Well, first we have to
take a watermelon..."

A Time Called Together

2008-10-06T07:53:00.001-07:00

It came to me like a ghost in the night ever so quietly. I lay there sleeping in the warmth of an ancient, old bed that had been passed down through the years in our family. It was a memory one that had been tucked away in the recesses of my mind. A memory I vowed never to forget, but somewhere through the passage of time it had faded, like so many other things I promised in my youth to remember forever. Why then this sudden resurgence of a long lost thought.

It was partially my son`s fault. It was knocked loose in the way that children have of doing with their innocence. He asked, "Dad, let`s go fishing." There was a time in my life; back when we were both young, he and I enjoyed the company of one another. Back in the days when time was a precious commodity. I looked at him with eyes that said "all right" but a heart that said I was tired.

Being a teenager of sixteen living in the nineties, he could not be fooled so easily and he said, "But if you`re tired I could call a friend." Then I said with a heavy heart, "Yeah, go ahead," minutes later I wanted to stop him and say, "Wait, I want to come with you." But I stood there frozen in time until the taillights were nothing but a distance memory. I wanted nothing more in life than to stop him not only from driving away but from growing up as well.

I wanted him young again and to be the most important thing in his life, but I could not, for time stops for no man or child. I stood there alone and thought, "in twenty-four months when he turns eighteen he will no longer be a child, but a man, and my chances will even be slimmer that he will ever ask me to go fishing again.

Just that suddenly I thought I herd laughter in the distance. I looked towards the yard and saw the ghost of a father and son playing ball, and tag, training the dog together. They were laughing and smiling, and sharing a moment in life that may never be again. That night as I went to bed there was no sweet dreams or visions of sugarplums that danced in my head. Instead there was a ghost of long times forgotten that I called yesterday, it bought with him a vision of a young boy in his teens vowing to himself that things were going to be different when he himself was a man. Then without warning the vision turned and the face I saw staring back was me. I was shocked, stunned then saddened at the thought of history, my history repeating itself. Was I too late? Had I become the man I vowed never to be?

In the early pre-hours of dawn, a time when the darkness is bought to life by the sweet chanting voice of a robin, I awoke my son from a sleep so peaceful and quiet and undauntedly asked the question, "Hey, do you want to go fishing?" With his head full of cobwebs he said, "No, I am tired." I then let him drift back to dreamland and said, "That`s all right; we will go later," and later we did. In mid-morning on a Saturday we did something centuries old that for as long as fathers and sons exist there will be a "Time Called Together."

Once the truck was loaded that morning we were on our way. Headed on a journey, not to just go fishing but to find something we had lost some-where through the years of growing up. There was a silence that morning that could only be understood between two souls searching for a way to find themselves again. How did we become so disconnected?

At one time we were a father and son who spent every waking hour together. Now in the span of three or four years something had come between us, a menace in our society called growing old. And how the two of us faced this menace would determine our connection to one another forever.

As we neared the lake, the silence was broken by my son, "I hope they`re biting." I smiled back with a smile of reassurance that my thoughts were the same. As we pulled along the lake, I got out and admired the sheer beauty of the moment. The lake was smooth as glass; a breeze gently blowing through the trees was calling an invitation to a father and son who were lost in the world rushing by them.

The first cast of the morning was elegant and sleek as the ultra thin line floated like a cobweb in the misty morning air and glided softly on the mirrored lake. We fished for hours that morning. Many strikes were felt and many fish were caught. What kind and exactly how many I can`t recall. What I do recall were the words spoken between a father and son. I remember the laughter and tears shared between two souls who cried out in the misty morning air for one another. By the time our fishing excursion was done, we had connected again. Like two broken wires that had been severed we were spliced and woven back together by common interest and love for one another. We were as one, but we were also different and that`s the way it should be.

That night, as we headed home down the dusty graveled road, a thought came to me that yes, time marches on for all of us. Then as I glanced over to my son and saw a child who use to be, I realized that a boy was disappearing from my sight forever. But in his place was growing a man I was proud to call my son.

Cell Phones and Children?

2008-09-27T11:50:00.000-07:00

Do you remember a time when most people on the roads just drove their car? Let me be more explicit. Do you remember a time when the main activities drivers engaged in were talking to a passenger, singing, and eating or drinking something?

Today it's not often that I simply see someone driving; a good third or so of the people are talking on their cell phones. Now I realize that my percentage is far from accurate data but the fact that a large number of people talk (via cell) and drive is common knowledge.

Of course the prominence of cell phones goes beyond the streets. You can find cell phones attached to ears everywhere. Little is sacred now; once that little phone rings a quick "excuse me" is the standard protocol. Sometimes I wonder if society is addicted; after all, people seem to take their phones everywhere, even when they are in the company of others. I see it when I walk my son around the neighborhood, other walkers and their cell phones. I've been out to eat with acquaintances that interrupt our dinner for their daily touch-base with their aunt. I've even accidentally responded to strangers in the grocery store who were looking my way, saying something, yet talking on those headset devices.

The good news for our cell-crazed culture is that a German study recently announced that their decade's long study found that cell phones were safe for adults. Of course there were caveats: they cannot make conclusions based on more than 10 years of cell phone usage and some cellular activity did change while being "under the influence" of mobile/cell phone radiation. (According to the article, even this information did not dissuade the survey from concluding that cell phones were safe.)

So, the good news is that, as of now, we can continue being a country obsessed with cell phones.

I think it's important to note though that the study could not make any safety statements regarding children and cell phone usage. Therefore, since there is not evidence one way or another they suggest that children do not use mobile phones.

Although most kids probably aren't concerned about how healthy it is to use cell phones, as their parents, we have to be. And since having a cell phone is starting to become "the thing" at earlier and earlier ages, we need to pay extra attention to future studies that focus on this population and cell phone exposure. It may just be that we have to tone down our usage of cell phones in order to keep our kids from becoming too eager to start acting like adults at the expense of their health. The question is: could we do it?

Forgetfulness

2008-09-15T08:59:00.000-07:00

24 Handy Ways to a Better Memory

Do you have a hard time remembering names, phone numbers, and important dates? Are you constantly losing your car in parking lots? When you leave for vacation, do you have to turn around 20 miles down the road to make sure you shut off all the appliances? Do you sometimes forget how to spell common words? If you can answer yes to most of these questions, here's some very good news: Forgetfulness is curable!

Er, let's see, where were we? Ah, yes. We checked with a few professional memory experts, and a few whose professions require excellent memories. We even checked with a 13-year-old national spelling bee champion. They told us their secrets for building an iron-clad memory.

"With a few simple devices, it's within most people's power to have a super memory," says memory expert Michael Pressley, Ph.D., professor of human development at the University of Maryland.

What kinds of devices? Glad you asked.

MEDICAL ALERT

Keep These Symptoms in Mind

Most skin lumps are not cancer, and most slips of memory are not Alzheimer's disease. "But people tend to be hard on themselves, particularly so as they get older," says Stanley Berent, Ph.D.

When is your forgetfulness so serious that you should see a professional about it? Dr. Berent suggests the following guidelines:

Do you lose contact with reality? It's one thing to forget today's date, another to forget the year. If you lose track of where you are, can't remember if it's evening or morning, or have forgotten the name of your spouse (as opposed to someone you just met), a doctor should be consulted.
Are you uncomfortable with yourself? If you're feeling anxious about your recent memory lapses, don't sweat it out—seek a doctor's advice.
Are you performing your day-to-day roles efficiently? If forgetfulness is affecting your work, your role as a parent or grandparent, or any of your other life activities, you may need help.

Above all, says Dr. Berent, know that your memory doesn't have to be perfect to be okay. Some forgetfulness is just part of life.

Think of remembering as re-membering. Say you're appearing on a television game show and you're on the verge of winning an all-expense-paid trip around the world. All you need to do is remember the name of the battle in which Napoleon was defeated. You know the answer. It's on the tip of your tongue. How to get it off?

"Try to reinstate as much as possible of what you know surrounding the issue," says Robin West, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the University of Florida. Thus, Napoleon may lead to Josephine, to France, to the Napoleonic Code, to battles, and (eventually) to Waterloo. "The more connections you make, the better your chances of finding the right pathway," says Dr. West.

Are There Any Pills for Forgetfulness?

Scientists have long looked for relationships between nutrients and your brain's ability to learn and remember. They know that a lack of certain nutrients can lead to memory and other cognitive failures, but whether supplemental nutrients can lead to supplemental memory is still a mystery.

Research over the past several years has focused on the following nutrients, all of which seem related to memory: vitamins B1 (thiamine), B6, B12, and C, choline, folate, niacin, calcium, copper, iodine, iron, magnesium, manganese, potassium, zinc, and—above all—lecithin.

Some research from the Institute of Physiology in Sofia, Bulgaria, raises questions and hopes about a new, exotic nutrient. Scientists there, experimenting with mice and ginseng, have determined that something in the root of the Chinese plant improves both learning and memory. At least with mice.

So it appears that the day may come when forgetfulness can be cured by popping a pill every morning. Of course, some of us will inevitably forget to take our pills.

Take a picture. The average American, in the course of a lifetime, spends a full year looking for misplaced objects. Want to save yourself a year of your life? You can. Take a good look at those keys as you place them on the table. "Raise your hands to your eyes, miming a camera, and click the button," suggests Joan Minninger, Ph.D., in her book Total Recall: How to Boost Your Memory Power.

Talk to yourself. Go ahead, don't be shy. Give yourself an aural as well as a visual image to remember. If you leave your car at the end of the parking lot, under the huge oak tree, go ahead and say, "I'm leaving my car at the far end of the parking lot, under the huge oak tree." Say it out loud. "It's another way to reinforce the memory," says Irene B. Colsky, Ed.D., a memory expert and adjunct professor in the Department of Teaching and Learning at the University of Miami.

Tie a yellow ribbon around the old oak tree. Afraid you'll remember your car is under an oak tree, but you'll forget which oak tree? Use physical reminders—they are "very efficient ways to remember," says Forrest R. Scogin, Ph.D., an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Alabama. The "yellow ribbon" on the oak tree could just as well be a rubber band around your wrist (to remind yourself to buy tissues), a wristwatch on the "wrong" arm (to remind yourself of Aunt Bertha's birthday)—or just about anything you can think of.

Make lists. Wherever and whenever possible, jot down on paper what you need to remember. "Our short-term memory has limited capacities—there's only so much space available," says Dr. Scogin. By making lists, you not only are assured of remembering what you wrote down, but it frees your mind for more important things.

Categorize. When pencil and paper are unavailable, you'll have to list things in your head—but don't do so randomly, says Dr. Scogin. If you're on your way to the grocery store and you know you need 20 items, you'll probably never remember all 20 unless they are logically grouped. Think: five vegetables, four paper goods, three fruits, etc.

Chunk. "Chunking" is like categorizing, but you do it with numbers. If, for instance, you had to remember the numbers 2, 0, 2, 4, 5, 6, 1, 4, 1, 4, you'd probably have a rough time of it. Remember (202) 456-1414 (the phone number of the White House) is quite a bit easier. Phone numbers come naturally chunked, as do social security numbers (001-00-1000). You are free, of course, to "chunk" not only these but any numbers you like.

Make up a silly story. If you've got several items to remember and you're afraid you never will—no problem. Just make up a tale involving your items, says Dr. Pressley. Say you're on your way to the market and you need pork chops, apricots, milk, and bread. Tell yourself a story in which a pig is drinking milk, in a wheat field, under the shade of an apricot tree.

To remember names, think of faces. Perhaps the most difficult memory task we're faced with is remembering the names of people we've just met, says Dr. Scogin. The trick is to etch in your mind a permanent association between the name and the face. Better yet, find a prominent feature on the face and focus in on that. If Budd Luzinski, that new guy in the office, happens to have a long nose—visualize a tiny man skiing down that long nose. Imagine that little man losing (Luzinski) those skis.

How to Avoid Stage Fright

For most of us, keeping a dozen or so phone numbers, an occasional shopping list, and the starting times of our favorite television shows under our cap is about all we demand of our short-term memory.

But what do you do when you have to remember a sales pitch, a speech, or the lines of a play? Or how to spell at a moment's notice any word in the English language? Professional Shakespearean actor Edward Gero and 13-year-old national spelling bee champion Rageshree Ramachandran of Sacramento, California, have a few tips for remembering words and their spellings.

From Edward Gero:

"Before I memorize my lines, they have to make sense to me. I will read Shakespeare's lines to myself, putting them into my own words."
"I look for rhythm patterns. 'To be, or not to be'Édum de, dum dum de dum."
"I look for any alphabetical keys. For instance, in MacBeth, I had to say the following line: 'But, I have none; the king-becoming graces, as justice, verity, temp'rance, stablenessÉ' It helped me to remember the order by knowing that the first two, justice and verity, are in alphabetical order, and that the second two, temp'rance and stableness, are in reverse alphabetical order."
"I try to associate lines with movements, so that in The Merchant of Venice, I say, 'and let my liver rather heat with wine' as I'm reaching for a glass of wine."

From Rageshree Ramachandran:

"A lot of spellers just try to memorize a list of words for spelling bees—that doesn't work. It's not just memorizing, it's learning the words. I make a new word part of my everyday vocabulary."
"Spelling is mostly logic. If a word is unfamiliar, I'll look for a part of it that I can understand. I can spell elegiacal, for instance, because I know it comes from elegy. (Elegiacal means expressing sorrow.) I can spell mhometer because I know that mho is the reciprocal of ohm, and a mhometer measures ohms (a measure of electricity)."
"A lot of memory is visual. It helps me to remember a new word if I write it down several times."
"There are often little tricks to help spell a word. Take curliewurly (a little squiggly shape). I had to remember that it was curliewurly, and not curlywurlie. The solution was simple: ie comes before y in the word—just like in the alphabet."

Make name associations. It's always easier to remember names if you have something to associate the name with. If you have to remember the name of someone who has no big nose or mole on the cheek, make up a little story. Picture someone named Bruce Taylor sitting in front of you with a pair of scissors, a measuring tape, and a piece of chalk. Someone named Feinstein, you might picture sitting before you holding a huge stein full of beer. Someone named Pressley? Imagine him reading the Pittsburgh Press or shaking hands with Elvis, says Dr. Pressley.

Look for "markers." Things that happened to you long ago did not happen in isolation from other events, says Dr. Pressley. Say, for instance, you forgot when it was that you worked at the ABC Construction Company. Think of any markers or cues that might help your focus. You may recall that you were dating so-and-so at the time, and that so-and-so and you would often go to the movies, and that one movie you saw together was Jaws. You may then recall (or your local librarian can help you find out) that Jaws appeared in the theaters in 1975.

Outline your thoughts. Many college students become intimately involved with a pink, yellow, or green highlighting marker. But you don't need a highlighter to outline your thoughts. You can do it mentally. "Select what is important and what is not," says Dr. Pressley. You're far less likely to forget what you read, he says.

Read, read, and read. If your problem is forgetting words, it's probably because you don't use them enough, says Frederic Siegenthaler. As a senior interpreter at the United Nations, he must store an enormous vocabulary in his memory and keep it ready to pull out at any moment. In English alone (and Siegenthaler is also fluent in French, German, Russian, and Spanish), there are as many as 200,000 words available, although we typically use fewer than 5,000 on a daily basis. So if you can't seem to find the right word, your vocabulary is likely to be a bit rusty.

Solution? "Do as much reading as you can," says Siegenthaler. "I recommend good fiction, particularly classics of the English language, such as those of Charles Dickens, Jane Austin, or Somerset Maugham.

Test yourself. "People generally aren't very good at knowing how good they are at remembering," says Dr. Pressley. "It's very common that someone may think he remembers something, but he doesn't." You've probably experienced this in the middle of an exam. The way to make sure it doesn't happen again is to give yourself a quiz before the exam, says Dr. Pressley. "A practice test will let you know if you have it down or not."

Keep calm. Stress and anxiety can clearly disrupt memory performance, says Dr. Pressley. "You need your consciousness to encode things. Anxiety eats that up."

If you're a forgetful person, it may be that your mind could use a vacation. Patricia Sze of Berlitz International Language School in New York City claims that her school's success in teaching students foreign languages lies largely in the nonthreatening environment of soothing colors, no grades, and no testing.

Check your medicine cabinet and liquor cabinet. Dozens of things have the potential to contribute to forgetfulness, says Stanley Berent, Ph.D., director of the Neuropsychology Program and an associate professor in the Department of Psychology, Psychiatry, and Neurology at the University of Michigan Medical School. At the root of your forgetfulness may be the booze you're drinking or certain drugs you're taking, such as diet pills, blood pressure medication, or antihistamines.

Aspartame harms young brains

2008-09-15T08:58:00.005-07:00

Learning and memory may be affected if young people have diet drinks containing the artificial sweetener aspartame, according to a US paediatrician who is presenting evidence today by telelink to the Health Committee at 10am. Mothers are also concerned about New Zealand schools which are now stocking artificially sweetened drinks instead of sugar soft drinks.

The Committee is hearing submissions on aspartame as a result of a petition which calls for the removal of all products containing aspartame and other artificial sweeteners from schools, as well as warning labels on products to alert pregnant women and mothers of young children.

"We are presenting this submission on behalf of over 8,000 people from throughout New Zealand, and especially for all those who have become aware that their symptoms of ill health are due to consuming products with aspartame," stated Alison White, Co-convenor of the Safe Food Campaign.

"The artificial sweetener is the most controversial and complained about additive in history. You only have to google it to see that. It is significant that non-industry funded studies have found various adverse health effects from aspartame, whereas industry-funded studies do not find problems. We cannot underestimate the power and sophistication of industry to maintain and expand its profit and market share, regardless of the health consequences of exposure to this substance."

"The manifestations of aspartame disease in young children are myriad," reported Dr Kenneth Stoller, MD. "These may range from severe headaches, unexplained visual loss, to depression, antisocial behaviour and seizures. Aspartame is not just a food additive. The components in it are isolated in a way that does not occur in nature. It is a neurotoxic drug, causing the deterioration of brain cells."

Mother of a school student, Mary Byrne, is concerned that the Hutt Valley school her daughter attends now stocks artificially sweetened drinks. "I think it's a good thing they're getting rid of sugar soft drinks from schools, but I don't think it's good they're replacing them with artificially sweetened drinks," said Ms Byrne. "I'm pleased that a teacher at the school my daughter is attending is going to show a video on aspartame to students. This gives students more information about the dangers of aspartame, so they are motivated to avoid it."

Aspartame is being used in an increasing number of products, an estimated 6000 products worldwide, not just those labelled 'diet' and 'sugar free' but also in chewing gum, sports drinks, dietary supplements and medications. Sometimes the only warning is 'contains phenylalanine'. An estimated one in 15 people consume aspartame around the world.

"We are alarmed that exposure of young people in New Zealand to aspartame is probably increasing," said Ms White. "Young children especially are at risk of developing an allergy to formaldehyde from aspartame products. Parents and doctors need to be alerted to the problem." The submission presented to the Health Committee includes the stories of three people who have become aware that their health problems were caused by aspartame.

The petition requests specifically:

1. Warning labels on all products containing aspartame to increase awareness of symptoms associated with aspartame toxicity, particularly to alert pregnant women and mothers of small children.

2. A public education programme to raise awareness about adverse reactions to aspartame.

3. A programme to raise awareness within the medical profession of the symptoms associated with aspartame toxicity, to prevent incorrect diagnosis of conditions that may be related to aspartame toxicity.

4. Removal of all products containing aspartame and other artificial sweeteners from schools to reduce toxic effects on young people, thus reducing any behavioural and psychological problems that may result from these effects.

A MORNING PRAYER

2008-09-15T08:58:00.004-07:00

Dear Lord, I thank you for this day. I thank You for my being able to see and to hear this morning. I'm blessed because You are a forgiving God and an understanding God. You have done so much for me and You keep on blessing me. Forgive me this day for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to you. I ask now for Your forgiveness.

Please keep me safe from all danger and harm. Help me to start this day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude. Let me make the best of each and every day to clear my mind so tha t I can hear from You.

Please broaden my mind that I can accept all things.

Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over. Let me continue to see sin through God's eyes and acknowledge it as evil. And when I sin, let me repent, and confess w ith my mouth my wrongdoing, and receive the forgiveness of God.

And when this world closes in on me, let me remember Jesus' example -- to slip away and find a quiet place to pray. It's the best response when I'm pushed beyond my limits. I know that when I can't pray, You listen to my heart. Continue to use me to do Your will.

Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others. Keep me strong that I may help the weak. Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for others. I pray for those who are lost and can't find their way. I pray for those who are misjudged and misunderstood. I pray for those who don't know You intimately. I pray for those who will delete this without sharing it w ith others. I pray for those who don't believe. But I thank you that I believe.

I believe that God changes people and God changes things. I pray for all my sisters and brothers. For each and every family member in their households. I pray for peace, love and joy in their homes that they are out of debt and all their needs are met.

I pray that every eye that reads this knows there is no problem, circumstance, or situation greater than God. Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight. I pray that these words be received into the hearts of every eye that sees them and every mouth that confesses them willingly..

This is my prayer.
In God's Name, May God bless you.

TODAY PRAYER

2008-09-15T08:58:00.003-07:00

Today is the day that the Lord hath made we will
rejoice and be glad in it...I thank you Jesus for your
love to me from day to day...As I look back over the years,
I thank you Jesus for all the answered prayers.
I cannot help but praise my Lord. I want to tell you Jesus
that I love you.....We'll shout it out and rebuke satan
in the name of Jesus. We plead the blood of Jesus upon
those who need a special healing or a special touch
from God in these days...Jesus you know all about your
children you tells us to enter right into the holy of
holies and make our request known unto you.. I pray that
you would wrap and shield each one in your loving arms
and hold them so tight, show them your love and that You
will work all things out for their good and your glory.
Lord many of your children is hurting today for different
reasons but we leave them in your care and we'll believe
for a miracle in Jesus name. I ask that God's protection
would be upon each and everyone in these difficult days.
If we love Him and live our lives according to His commands,
even when life seems so hopeless and dark, God is about
to bring blessing into your life. Thank you Jesus for
what you are about to do.....Amen

Freedom of Simplicity

2008-09-15T08:58:00.002-07:00

Freedom of Simplicity
By Bo Sanchez

Happiness is not found outside of you. It doesn't come from cars,
clothes,cash, or Caribbean cruises. Happiness is found within.
But how can you find it if you don't have the simplicity of time
and space to discover the most important things in your life?

How can you search the depths of your soul if you are too busy
impressing others, acquiring wealth, protecting your properties, and
paying your debts?

Simplicity is not about the external either: living in a doghouse,
eating in Hepatitis joints, wearing rags.

Let me define what it is: Simplicity is living from the core of your being.

A TREASURE MAP OF HAPPINESS

Simplicity will point to you where and what and who the gold is in your life.
Let me share with you the seven powerful lessons I've learned on simple living:

1. LIVE ON LESS, AND DELIGHT IN THEM MORE
Some take their pleasure dining in classy restaurants, trips to Europe ,
and owning the latest home theatre-equipment. I've chosen the simple path:
If I can simply be with my wife, or take a quiet stroll under a canopy of stars,
or play with a child, or read a good book in my home, or laugh with friends
over a pizza, I consider myself richly blessed.

Focus on what you have and not on what you don't have.

2. STOP RUNNING AND WALK INSTEAD
Here's the truth: The person who has covered the greatest distance does
NOT win, but the one who has most enjoyed the journey does. Stop
running around chasing your own tail!

Get off your hurried pace and learn to breathe. Replace doing with
being. Learn to say no to invitations, appointments, and commitments,
activities and events that will rob you of your focus. Learn to say
"yes" to rest, to tranquility, to quietness.

3. YOU ARE MORE THAN YOUR WEALTH
I own very few things today. Because I am more than the brand of my
watch,the logo of my shoes, the name of my car. I believe that if in my soul
I deeply respect and value myself, people around me will sense that, and they too,
will value and respect me-whether I'm wearing Armani or not.

You are more than your wealth.

4. AVOID BUYING ON CREDIT
I don't believe in borrowing from credit cards. (For convenience, I use one card
but I pay the whole amount at the end of each month.) If I need something really bad,
I save up for it. Sometimes, at midpoint, I realize I don't really need the darn thing
and give up the whole idea. The only exception I feel we should enter into a
credit is when buying a non-depreciating item, such as housing or land.
I believe we should always live within our earning capacity.
Proverbs 22:7 says, "Those who borrow are slaves of moneylenders."

5. GIVE AS MUCH AS YOU CAN
If I content myself with 25 shirt instead of 400 Lacoste, I can help others more.
Trust me, there is immense pleasure! You will find that the empty thrill of owning a
diamond ring on your finger pales in comparison to the joy of handling a
piece of bread to an orphan child.

"And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times,
having all that you need, you will abound in every good work." (2 Corinthians 9:8)

The Old Testament of tithing, or giving 10% of your income is a good guideline to follow.
The New Testament challenges us to give with a cheerful heart. (When you're cheerful,
you may give more than 10%!) Make it a habit.

6. SAVE AS MUCH AS YOU CAN
Saving is essential to being good stewards of the money that God "lends" to us.
Saving is an important way of providing for our future-both for our needs and
to be generous to others. I recommend that you save at least 10% of your income.
I can almost hear you now: "Bo, that's impossible!" Oh yeah? Well, how did you
live three years back when your salary was one-half its present amount?"
Sacrifice. Many of our needs are actually wants. Is cable TV a need? Will you
suddenly die if you can't watch CNN or HBO? Are those new golf clubs essential
to your existence? Invest in time deposits, long-term stocks and housing.

7. BUDGET, BUDGET, BUDGET
Make a list of all your monthly expenses, according to categories. Make also a list
of irregular expenses-those that don't come monthly. Set up another savings account
for these expenses and put in a little money each month. To differentiate this from
the savings account, we call ours "freedom account" because it frees us from worrying
about them when they suddenly attack. And stick to your budget!

ONE LAST WORD BEFORE WE CLOSE
Balance.
Don't take living simply to the extremes! Living simply doesn't mean living in deprivation.
There are special days when my wife and I eat in a fancy restaurant. Or, when we splurge into a
vacation. Very rare, yes, but my point is that you take living simply NOT as a rigid goal-
but as a happy process towards the goals of generosity, inner peace and holiness.

How to End Negative Thinking

2008-09-15T08:58:00.001-07:00

End negative thinking and learn to see the light.

Rid your mind of negative thoughts.

Instructions

Step1

Become aware of the negative though process. If you are a negative thinker, odds are negative thinking is second nature to you. In order to stop the negative thoughts from taking over you'll have to practice awareness. Try to be aware of everything you're thinking all the time. Tie a reminder string around your finger or stick up post-it notes if you are having a hard time remembering to be aware.

Step2

Once you catch yourself in a negative thought, stop yourself. Take a deep breath and focus on what you are doing. Use your five senses to concentrate on the moment. If you are getting dressed, for example, think about how the material feels, what your shirt smells like, what sounds you hear outside. By the time you are finished getting dressed you will feel calmer and the negative thoughts will have vanished.

Step3

Practice. Don't give up on yourself. This can be a difficult task since it takes up a lot of brainpower. Howver, if you are truly committed to ending your negative thought process this simple exercise will help you stay on the track to positivity.

Step4

Replace the negative thought with a positive one even if you don't believe in it. Eventually it will become truth. If every day when you get dressed you think about how fat you look, replace that with a thought about how good you look after your five senses exercise.

Home Remedies You Can Use To Improve Your Memory

2008-09-15T08:58:00.000-07:00

If you are having problems remembering things, there are some simple things you can do to improve your memory. The first thing you will want to master is repetition. When you repeat things many times over, it increasing the chances that your brain will store it into your long term memory.

Repetition is directly connected to your ability to memorize important information. The next thing you will want to use is association. If you need to remember something that is important, associate it with an image which is very important to you.

By making this connection, your brain is much more likely to retain the information. You should also strive to learn at least one new fact each day. It should be something you're interested in. Your brain is much more likely to retain information that interests you. It will discard information that you find to be boring. A large percentage of our brains are composed of fatty substances. Because of this, the foods we consume can have an effect on the function of our brains. Because of this, you will want to make sure you only eat foods which are healthy to your brain. Eating good foods for your brain is just as important as eating the proper foods for the rest of your body.

It is also important to exercise your mind. Like your muscles, a brain which is exercised will be mentally fit. If you don't exercise your brain, you will become mentally weak. Antioxidants can enhance your immune system and protect your neurons. This is very important as you age, as memory problems have been connected to the aging process. Blackberries, raspberries, and raisins are excellent for keeping your brain healthy as you get older. These foods are full of antioxidants. Another product you will want to eat on a consistent basis is almonds. Eating about eight almonds a day can do a lot to improve your memory.

Milk and honey have been shown to help improve your memory. While there are many books you can buy which will present a number of techniques you can use to improve your memory, you don't want to forget about the foods you eat. Many people take this for granted. We always hear about the foods which are good to eat for those who want to lose weight and stay in great shape. Unfortunately, you don't hear a lot about the importance of brain food. What good is being physically fit if you are not mentally fit as well?

When you were young, your parents probably told you to eat lots of fruits and vegetables, and there is a reason for this. Studies have consistently shown that eating the right foods can help you improve your memory. We live in a society where eating bad foods is the norm for many people. It is unfortunate that more fast food restaurants don't add either fruits or vegetables to their menu. However, it is up to you to take responsibility for the health of both your brain and your body. Nobody has a more vested interest in your health than you. We live in a world of information.

On a daily basis, the typical individual can expect to receive a ton of information. Much of this information is worthless, and your brain will discard it. However, there is a lot of information which is presented to you that has to be memorized. Because of this, your brain must know what information should be retained and what should be discarded. Having a knowledge of memory improvement techniques will allow you to store important information in your long term memory while discarding data which is not important. By eating the right foods will make this process easier. There are two primary reasons why people have memory problem.

The first reason is a result of them not knowing how to control the information that they receive. The second reason is not caring for their mind and body in a way that makes it easier for them to process information. Once you master these two things, there is little that will be able to stop you from enjoying a long, health life were you continue to learn new things each day.

MOMs are the world's best spies

2008-09-05T20:56:00.000-07:00

A Mom comes to visit her son Kumar for dinner.....who lives with a
girl roommate Sunita. During the course of the meal, his mother
couldn't help but notice how pretty Kumar's roommate was. She had long
been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only
made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she
started to wonder if there was more between Kumar and his roommate
than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, Kumar volunteered, 'I know what you must
be thinking, but I assure you, Sunita and I are just roommates.' About
a week later, Sunita came! to Kumar saying, 'Ever since your mother
came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver plate. You don't
suppose she took it, do you?' Kumar said ,'Well, I doubt it, but I'll
email her, jjust to be sure.'

So he sat down and wrote :

Dear Mother:

I'm not saying that you 'did' take the silver plate from my house, I'm
not saying that you 'did not' take the silver plate .. But the fact
remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

Love, Kumar

Several days later, Kumar received an email from his Mother which read

Dear Son:

I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Sunita, and I'm not saying
that you 'do not' sleep with Sunita. But the fact remains that if she
was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the silver plate by
now under the pillow...

Love,

Mom.

Lesson of the day:

Don't Lie to Your Mother...... .....especially if she is Indian !

Home Remedies for CHILDREN ::: HEADACHES

2008-09-05T20:25:00.000-07:00

HEADACHES

How Doctors Spell Relief

If you're like many parents, you probably think of headaches as something kids give you, not something kids get. But research indicates that 50 to 70 percent of all school-age children have experienced a headache, according to Francis J. DiMario, Jr., M.D., assistant professor of pediatrics and neurology at the University of Connecticut in Farmington.

''The causes of children's headaches are very similar to the causes of adult headaches,'' says Dr. DiMario. ''They get tension headaches; headaches associated with injury, illness or fever; and migraines.'' About 10 percent of children with headaches get chronic migraines.

All kinds of kids' headaches usually respond to the same treatments used for adult headaches, from over-the-counter pain relievers and warm compresses for occasional headaches to prescription drugs and biofeedback for chronic headaches. Even if your child's headache requires professional intervention, the experts say there are still measures you can take at home to help make the medical treatment more effective.

MEDICAL ALERT

When to See the Doctor

Though rare, headaches can sometimes be symptoms of a serious problem such as meningitis, a brain tumor or bleeding in the brain, according to Loraine Stern, M.D., associate clinical professor of pediatrics at the University of California, Los Angeles, and author of When Do I Call the Doctor? She says you should call your doctor if your child's headache:

* Is accompanied by a fever, vomiting, stiff neck, lethargy or confusion.

* Follows a head injury.

* Occurs in the morning, accompanied by nausea.

* Increases in severity over the course of a day or from one day to the next.

* Is suddenly brought on by a sneeze or cough.

* Interferes with school or other activities.

* Is restricted to one side of the head.

Before attempting any of these home remedies, however, read the ''Medical Alert'' above to determine if your child's headache might be the symptom of something more serious.

Turn to a proven painkiller. ''Simple analgesics such as acetaminophen [Children's Tylenol] are perfectly acceptable and effective for children's headaches, just as they are for adults','' says Dr. DiMario. Check the package directions for the correct dosage for your child's age and weight.

Apply a soothing compress. ''Some kids like warm cloths on their heads, others like cold cloths. You just need to experiment,'' says William Womack, M.D., associate professor in the Department of Child Psychiatry at the University of Washington School of Medicine and codirector of the Stress Management Clinic of Children's Hospital and Medical Center, both in Seattle. ''Keep the compress on for about 30 minutes, rewetting it as necessary,'' he says.

Head for bed. ''Rest seems to be one of the most effective ways to reduce a migraine headache,'' says Dr. DiMario. ''Many school nurses allow kids with headaches to lie down for half an hour. Often that is all that's necessary. They don't necessarily have to go to sleep. Just a half-hour of lying quietly can help.'' If your child is very sensitive to bright light during a migraine episode, you should draw the shades so he can rest in a darkened room, adds Dr. Womack.

Rub away the ache. Like adults, kids with tension headaches can often find relief by reducing stress. ''If your child is stressed out, relaxing massage might help,'' says Alexander Mauskop, M.D., director of the New York Headache Center in New York City and assistant professor of neurology at the State University of New York Health Science Center.

''If the muscles around the scalp or temples are tender, gently rubbing them can be helpful,'' says Dr. DiMario. ''But some kids don't like it because the scalp is too tender to touch.'' If your child says stop, don't insist--but many children do like that soothing touch of a parent's fingertips.

Make meal-skipping a misdemeanor. Make sure your child doesn't skip meals, especially breakfast, which is the most important one, warns Dr. Mauskop. ''Going all day without eating is a good way to get a headache or aggravate one you already have,'' he says.

Watch that egg roll, hold that pizza. By paying attention to what your child eats and when he gets his headaches, you may be able to spot a link. ''In some susceptible children, headaches are triggered by certain things they eat, such as chocolate, peanuts, processed meat and aged cheese,'' says Dr. DiMario. ''Pizza and Chinese food, if they contain monosodium glutamate, can bring on headaches in some children.'' If you think you've uncovered a connection, have your child avoid the suspect food and see what happens.

Curb the caffeine. Like grown-ups deprived of their customary morning coffee, kids can suffer from withdrawal headaches when they don't get their daily ''fix'' of caffeine. ''Caffeine withdrawal headaches are common in children who drink cola and eat a lot of chocolate--both of which contain caffeine,'' says Dr. Mauskop. If your child is susceptible, you may need to strictly limit these items, offering them only as an occasional treat.

Chart those mood swings. Some kids' headaches have emotional rather than food triggers, says Kenneth Covelman, Ph.D., director of psychosocial services for the Pediatric Pain Management Program at Children's Hospital of Philadelphia and clinical assistant professor of psychology in psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine, also in Philadelphia. ''By charting not just your child's headaches but also his moods and activities for several days or weeks, you can sometimes see a pattern. For example, headaches may occur just before tests in school, or after arguments,'' says Dr. Covelman.

Have a plan to defuse tensions. ''If you've identified an emotional trigger of your child's headaches,'' says Dr. Covelman, ''help him formulate a plan for dealing with it.'' Your child may feel a lot better if he has more control over situations, he suggests.

''For example, if headaches occur after upsetting fights with his sister, talk about what he can do differently the next time they're playing together. Through role-playing, rehearse what he might say to her, such as, 'I don't like when you do this to me, so I'm not going to play with you until you apologize.' '' Having a plan of action can help defuse the tension that leads to the headaches, says Dr. Covelman.

Don't rule out random events. If no dietary or emotional triggers emerge after a few weeks of charting your child's headaches, broaden the scope of your search, suggests Loraine Stern, M.D., associate clinical professor of pediatrics at the University of California, Los Angeles, and author of When Do I Call the Doctor? '' Write down what the weather was like, how much your child slept the night before his headache. . . every possible factor you can think of.

''I had one child whose headaches seemed to come from the sunlight that shimmered on the surface of the family pool,'' Dr. Stern says. ''Her parents noticed that if she went into the pool at a certain time of day, the light reflecting off the water gave her a headache. Often it's cockamamy things like that you might miss if you don't keep a record.''

Reserve some time for fun. Many children who suffer from recurring headaches have fallen into the ''all work and no play'' trap, according to Dr. Womack. They need to schedule some fun.

''I see a lot of well-motivated, high-achieving, but overly intense kids in my clinic,'' he says. ''They're in a lot of extracurricular activities, and they're preoccupied with getting good grades. They're perfectionists, type-A personalities who are really driven to achieve. For them, headaches have become a barometer of the stress in their lives.''

If your child is like this, Dr. Womack suggests that you help your child decide which pursuits are most important and cut back on the rest. ''That will free up some time for relaxation and fun,'' says Dr. Womack. ''Children need to remember that things don't have to always be heavy and serious, and their efforts don't have to be perfect all the time.''

Neutralize the Nintendo headache. Muscular tension headaches are often the result of mental stress. But sometimes they can have a purely physical cause, says Dr. Stern. For example, if your child plays a lot of video games or does work on a computer, he may be inviting a headache by holding his head in one position too long. Encourage him to roll his head occasionally or take frequent breaks.

Harness imagination's healing power. Visualization, biofeedback and other special relaxation techniques are often employed by professionals to help their patients head off headaches. But it's possible for parents to teach kids some basic relaxation skills at home, Dr. Womack says.

He suggests trying this technique: ''Ask the child to imagine he's taking a warm shower and that everywhere the water strikes his body instantly feels more relaxed. Or have him picture himself stepping into a warm pool where the water gradually rises over his toes, his feet, his ankles and on up. This is a form of progressive muscle relaxation that kids find less boring than formal progressive muscle relaxation exercises.''

Put yourself in the picture, too. If your child is learning relaxation techniques, you should also learn them, says Dr. Covelman. '' Younger children may need some help practicing the techniques at home, and it's very helpful for parents to be able to do them, too,'' he says.

Support without nagging. Kids with chronic headaches need to practice their relaxation skills regularly, says Dr. Womack. ''Unfortunately, many kids find repetitive practicing of any kind boring, like having to practice the piano.'' But if you nag them about it, he says, it's counterproductive--it just creates more stress. Be supportive instead.

''In addition to making space and time available for the child to practice,'' says Dr. Womack, ''you need to remind him that this is something important that he should want to be doing for himself. If you give the child primary responsibility but make it clear that you want to help him to succeed, most kids will go along with it.''

Dad's Blessings

2008-09-02T20:15:00.000-07:00

A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.

As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box. Curious, but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angry, he raised his voice to his father and said "With all your money, you give me a Bible?" and stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible.

Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.

When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. And as he did, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words PAID IN FULL.

How many times do we miss Spirit's blessings and answers to our prayers because they do not arrive exactly as we have expected?

TODAY'S's affirmation: "Today I look beyond the obvious and allow miracles to be created in my life."

Children Anger Management Tips

2008-09-01T23:53:00.000-07:00

Kids with unmanaged anger can grow up to face big problems. That is why it is so important to help your child learn to process negative emotions in appropriate ways from an early age. You can help them by trying helpful children anger management tips. Even toddlers can learn a little bit about self-control, although tantrums to a certain extent are bound to occur. Here are some children anger management tips that may help your family enjoy a more peaceful home environment.

Young Children Anger Management Tips

If you have toddlers or even preschoolers, you know that they are still learning to control their tempers, especially in public. Many parents are looking for young children anger management tips, and will eagerly accept suggestions from their parents, educators, and community leaders. It is important to remain calm during tantrums and outbursts, but also to be firm and consistent in issuing discipline so your child will take you seriously. Young children anger management tips include timeouts and distracting little ones from disgruntled emotions when they threaten to burst into angry behavior.

Teen Children Anger Management Tips

When dealing with teen children anger management tips, you may have to substitute diplomacy and tact for discipline in this age group. Learn how to be a good listener, quietly asking your son or daughter about their day at school, friends, social activities, and concerns or problems. When you see that they are visibly upset about something, calmly explore that area by asking more focused questions or inviting discussion. In addition, you may want to talk about acceptable ways of expressing displeasure or irritation, such as avoiding certain situations, politely asking for substitutions, or suggesting alternative ways of doing something. Let your kids know in clear terms which behaviors will not be tolerated, such as the use of profanity, throwing things, slamming doors, or refusing to cooperate with housework or homework. You can post the rules on the refrigerator and even invite your teen to help write the guidelines, along with suggesting appropriate consequences for infractions.

Teen children anger management tips might include rewards for self-control and appropriate anger processing. Rewards could be extra time on the computer, telephone, or television or reduced household chores for that week. Kids need to see a balance between love coupled with forgiveness and discipline linked to consequences. Let your teens know you are on their side, but that as they mature, they must become responsible for managing emotions, including anger, in adult-like ways that are socially acceptable.

Raising kids is harder than ever these days. Questionable or negative role models, me-centered self-gratification, and dwindling social restrictions encourage children to express unrestrained emotions that can wreak havoc on families and society. If you feel that your children are starting to display signs of uncontrolled rage, visit websites like anger-management-information.com to learn more about anger management training generally, and for specific examples of children anger management tips. Then talk to your child’s teacher or a social services worker for more information about getting your child the help that is needed for anger management.

Adolescent Anger Management Strategies

2008-09-01T23:51:00.000-07:00

Adolescent anger management is becoming more prominent in our society. Traditionally, children who enter this last acute phase of bodily and mental development can go through some rough times. As kids enter their preteen and then their teenage years, chaos can ensue at times for everyone involved. A child or young adult may feel that his or her body and mind are out of control occasionally, and the parents and teachers who supervise children at this age may tend to agree. Anger can spring out of nowhere to challenge innocent requests and reasonable expectations. Yet kids between the age of twelve and sixteen sometimes react in unpredictable ways, surprising those around them and even themselves and requiring the intervention of adolescent anger management strategies.

Today’s teens face even greater pressures than those of the past. By age eighteen, most have witnessed thousands of murders on television and video games. Some are involved in violent or illegal gang activity. Others come from broken homes where domestic violence and substance abuse are the norm. By the time they start going through puberty, their entire existence may seem out of their control, and they may grow increasingly enraged, acting out their anger in antisocial ways that require adolescent anger management.

Adolescent Anger Management and Juvenile Delinquents

Sadly, many teens experience frustrations that drive them to vent anger toward people or things, breaking civil laws. This type of behavior often leads to incarceration, or at the very least, intervention by parents, teachers, law enforcement officials, and juvenile experts who attempt to train children how to respond in age-appropriate ways. Adolescent anger management programs teach kids individually or in peer groups how to identify negative feelings, work through them in the right kind of ways, seek help when needed, and practice more mature behaviors.

During periods of time spent at juvenile detention centers, teens involved in adolescent anger management programs can learn how to improve their behavior in socially acceptable ways. Therapists can help to point out alternative attitudes and behaviors to teens who have never seen positive responses to everyday irritations modeled for them by responsible adults. They may be able to learn directly from the therapist how to manage difficult feelings, and they can read resource materials or visit websites like anger-management-information.com (site is not complete yet) for more information about this condition, and how to address it. They will find others like themselves who are learning how to get along with people and accept the situations that cannot be changed.

Community Adolescent Anger Management Programs

If you have or work with a teenager that is struggling with angry outbursts and a poor attitude, get in touch with a teacher or psychologist at your child’s school or a community social services organization that can direct you to self-help resources or a local adolescent anger management group that might be willing to admit your child. Letting unresolved anger fester or continue to be displayed in dangerous ways can lead to serious consequences. Get your teen the help that is needed for coping with this behavioral disorder.

Stress-Relief Tips for Anger Management Children

2008-09-01T23:49:00.000-07:00

Families that deal with heavy loads of stress sometimes face problems from creating anger management children. In other words, parental conflicts and family dysfunction may lead to anger management children issues that require professional assistance. If you notice that your kids are lashing out with angry comments or withdrawing with sulky behavior, it may be time to make an appointment with a therapist for help with your anger management children.

Types of Anger Management Children

Kids are just as capable of rage as adults, although they may express it differently or to a variant degree. In a troubled home, kids may be upset by parental neglect, abandonment, busy schedules, or avoidance, to name a few. Anger management children require early diagnosis and special interventions or anger management training to help them cope and become adjusted to more normal emotional processing as quickly as possible.

Anger management children may not even realize they are hurt and upset about family situations. They may have stuffed their feelings so far down inside that they cannot even recognize them anymore. These kids are just as surprised as everyone else when they suddenly snap, yelling, hitting, or fleeing a conflict-based situation at home or at school. When these behaviors occur, it is best to consult an anger management therapist who can provide a suitable intervention plan to help anger management children learn how to deal with frightening emotions.

Helpful Tips for Dealing With Anger Management Children

If your child has demonstrated problems with controlling his or her anger or attitude, you may want to consult an anger management specialist who can advise you about whether your child might benefit from counseling or group therapy. In addition, you may want to work closely with your child’s teacher to provide assistance in recognizing and avoiding triggers of your son or daughter’s rage. Anger management children may not even realize they are angry, so this will require diplomacy and discretion on both parents’ and teacher’s parts.

Another way to help your child work through anger-provoking issues is to provide daily quality time for sharing thoughts, experiences, and moods in a quiet place where other family members will not intrude. Processing daily issues rather than waiting for them to build up and explode can help your child retain control of his or her temper. Anger management children sometimes act as though they don’t want your help, but inside, most are grateful.

If you are a parent of anger management children, you may be unsure about where to find information or help. One way to find free useful information is by browsing the Internet. Check out sites like anger-management-information.com (site is not complete yet) that can provide resources and support as you work through this challenging situation. You also can ask your child’s principal or school psychologist for referrals to anger management therapists who may be able to help your anger management children learn to deal with uncomfortable emotions in socially acceptable ways. Give your child plenty of hugs and be a good listener to learn more about his or her personal needs and concerns.

How to Teach Anger Management to Your Child

2008-09-01T23:48:00.000-07:00

Most of us recognize the continuing escalation of violence around us, due to intolerance, and many of us blame it on somebody else. Parents teach their children, all the time, and when one of us displays “road rage,” while our child is in the car, we teach a brand new skill set.

Although, road rage is inappropriate behavior, at any time, and can get you killed, most children who are exposed to it, will duplicate the actions of their parents, when they are old enough to drive.

So the first step, is to set an example and, possibly, use some of these ideas, for yourself. Studies show that anger causes atherosclerosis, the build-up of plaques in the arteries, that is a major factor in developing high blood pressure, heart disease, heart attack, and premature death.

Also, during a “temper tantrum,” adrenaline and blood pressure levels rise beyond normal. This behavior is more dangerous to parent’s bodies due to the normal “wear and tear” already existing.

Now, you may be convinced that anger can kill you, but let’s look at one more factor. You could hurt someone else, find yourself in prison, or get yourself killed due to inciting violence against others. There are other people, who are having difficulty dealing with anger management too.

Back to our children: All children need exercise and they are naturally full of energy. Look at any other species, and you will see the same behavior. Should we drug our dogs, cats, and parrots, when they display youthful exuberance?

Children have to run, jump, and shout. So let them play in the back yard, in a park, and get them involved in sports, Yoga, dance, or martial arts. You will never regret letting your child enjoy life, constructively learn in the process, and just be a kid.

For all of us, there is a time to be quiet and a time to shout. Children need years to learn this, so let’s keep them active in the process. Keep them away from the television, Internet, and video games, except for “rainy days.” Coloring books, board games, and reading are also good activities for rainy days.

A heavy bag is a great tool for letting anger out. You and your child can use it together. You can learn to punch and kick it, for the aerobic benefits, as well. If you have a friend who is a boxer or martial artist, you could get some pointers. After just a 20-minute session, I guarantee you, and your child, will have dealt with anger - there will be little, if any, left.

Teach your child forgiveness, through your own example. I am not asking you to let people “walk all over you.” However, let grudges go; life is really too short to keep a feud going.

You can also control your child’s “circle of friends,” just by getting him or her involved in, group activities such as: League sports, dance, yoga, or martial arts. The parents who have their children in these activities want the best for them and are willing to sacrifice their time, or money, to get it.

This will keep your child busy, happy, and active, with a pre-selected crowd of friends, who have parents that care. This is a “win – win” situation and well worth the investment.

This is not to say that every child you run into, at these functions, will be perfect, but in the above mentioned activities, all of them are structured, adult-supervised, and rules for behavior are in place. This form of organization becomes a habit, your child will follow these guidelines, and bring them home.

Here is another idea that will help. Have your child take care of a pet or a plant, every day. Children love to care for animals or plants, but they still need supervision. The result of this will be, your child learns compassion.

Compassion will keep anger “in check” every time.

Ease Your Childs

2008-09-01T22:07:00.000-07:00

What you can do to help your little scholar feel better about the coming school year. Even if you don't know exactly why your child is anxious, here are a few things you can do to help him or her feel better about the coming school year:

· Talk about your first-day-of-school experiences. If you don't remember, have your kids ask their grandparents what they remember about your first day of school. "It almost doesn't matter if the experiences were positive or negative," Cohen says. "It's sharing them that's important because it makes your child see that this happens to everyone."

· Don't assume your child is anxious. Physiologically, there is little difference between anxiety and excitement, Cohen says. Just because you remember being anxious about school doesn't mean that your child is. Asking about the bus 100 times could be enthusiasm instead of anxiety.

· Make sure your child knows at least one person at her new school. If your child is starting kindergarten this year, get a class list from the office and arrange a couple of playdates with kids from your child's class. Knowing that there will be a familiar face at school helps to ease first-day jitters.

· Visit the school and do a test-run of the route to school. This helps to minimize the fear of the unknown.

· Cherish the end of the summer. Even for children who love the classroom, going to school is a draining process. Cohen suggests that parents use the time at the end of the summer to fill the child up – not by scheduling as much as possible, but by making time to just hang out and spend time together.

· Role-play. Play "school" with your younger children. Let them be the teacher – you be the student. Make sure that you include a drop-off and reunion scenario in the day. With older kids, try to get them to talk to you about what they think might be hard situations in the coming year, then have them do a trial run with you.

· Use humor. This works with all kids, but especially well with middle-school students. A well-placed hand on the hip and an exaggerated, exasperated question such as "Is there anything you can think of that may be only half-bad this year at school?" can go a long way to breaking up the tension your child might feel about returning to school.

If your child seems to really loathe going back to school, there may be something a little deeper than first-day jitters. If your child has a history of social and academic struggles, talk to the teachers, principals and guidance counselors about what kind of help is available.

Easing Back-to-School Jitters

As the new school year looms on the horizon, the questions start: "Mom, what's the bus going to be like?" "Do you think my new teacher will be as nice as the one I had last year?" Or, maybe your child will simply act up every time you set foot in the school-supplies section of your local department store.

If the mention of school means repeated questions or acting out, it may not be Calm those fears.

7 Ways to Ease Your Child's Back-to-School Anxiety that your kids are grumpy that the leisure of summertime is coming to a close – they might have a case of the new-school-year butterflies. The trouble is, even if kids are worried about returning to school, many can't articulate what exactly they are worried about, says Larry Cohen, Ph.D., author of Playful Parenting and an advisor to the Lego Learning Initiative. "That can be confusing for parents who know there really isn't anything to worry about," Cohen adds. "Parents end up having to make their best guess, because they can't just grill their kids until they tell them."

Here are some of the common reasons children may be anxious about the new school year:

· Fear of the Unknown – For kids who are starting school for the first time, or even kids who are making a transition from one school to another, just not knowing what to expect can cause stress. "This is especially true for kids who are starting kindergarten," Cohen says. "It's so unknown, it's such a big step, and adults have built it up so much, kids can become anxious about what this big, strange new thing is going to be like."

· Social Stress – Kids who have a hard time making friends may worry that they'll be alone in the coming school year. This is especially tough for kids who have been teased or excluded in prior school years.

· Following Up a Good Year – If your child had a great school year last year, he or she could be worried that the coming school year won't live up to the last one.

· Mourning What's Lost – Your child could just be upset by the coming loss of unstructured summer time.

· Fear of Failure, Pressure to Excel – "Kids who haven't done well in school often worry that they'll be embarrassed or humiliated or that they'll fail," Cohen says. "But children who do well in school have that anxiety at least as much as kids who fail, and many times more so because they put so much pressure on themselves."

Getting Out the Door

For most families, back-to-school means a new schedule complete with homework, meetings, practices and new activities. Remembering everything that has to be ready to go each day can turn your mornings into a mad dash. It doesn't have to be this way.

With a little organization, you really can make this the year your family commits to making every morning a smooth one. Experiment with these tips, adapted from At-A-Glance and Stacy M. DeBroff's The Mom Book (The Free Press, 2002), to find out which ones work best with your bunch:

The Night Before

· Create a launching area. Whether it's a table by the door, the kitchen counter, or the lumpy chair in the living room, have one designated place where your kids put the items they'll need the next day. In the morning, just grab and go.

· Choose an outfit at night. Lay it out the night before – right down to the socks and accessories.

· Have the lunches ready, labeled, and in the fridge for everyone who takes one.

It may take a couple of weeks, but force yourself to follow this routine. The entire family will reap the benefits.

Family Calendar

· Invest in a master family calendar. Make sure there's plenty of space to write appointments and daily reminders.

· Hang the calendar in a central location. Make sure everyone in the family uses it. TIP: Don't answer questions about dates and times – send them to the calendar.

· Nothing is too minor to be written down. Tests, parties, big games, concerts, promised family time, days school is closed – everything.

· Make checking the calendar part of getting ready the night before. If the calendar says your son has a soccer game, then he'd better put his uniform in the launching area the night before.

· Color code the entries on the calendar. Make colors stand for certain activities or assign a color to each of your children. Your daughter can then ignore anything on the calendar that isn't written in green.

Insure Your Child's Smile

2008-09-01T22:06:00.000-07:00

Insure Your Child's Smile

When your child eats, food passes through the mouth and it meets the germs or bacteria that live in the mouth. These bacteria have sugars and starches found in many foods. If you do not clean your child's teeth after eating, plaque bacteria use the sugars and starches to produce acid that destroys the hard surface of the tooth. After a while tooth begins to decay.

Tooth decay is a common problem among children, worldwide. The mouth is the pathway to the body and it is also his vehicle of communication. If he has bad teeth, it can effect his social life. Children with unsightly teeth avoid smiling or speaking and gradually become introverted. So it is very important to be careful about your child's dental health.

One of the serious dental problems that occurs in childhood and is completely preventable is caries. Make sure that your child gets enough fluoride, eats right and is regularly checked by a dentist.

What is flouride and why is it important?
Fluoride is a natural chemical that can be added to drinking water. It is important because: -
It strengthens the enamel, the hard outer coating of the teeth.

• It prevents tooth decay.

• It helps repair early damage to the teeth.

• Sufficient fluoride ingestion promotes optimal tooth development.

The fluoride content in the municipal water supply varies from place to place. Water with low levels of fluoride can be a problem for infants. But, remember to consult your paediatrician before you start with any remedy.

Eating Right

Diet and nutrition play an important role in delaying tooth decay. The child's diet during tooth formation can contribute to the resistance or susceptibility of teeth to acid destruction. Children with a teeth-unfriendly diet are more susceptible to dental problems. For good dental health, keep the following tips in mind: -

• Give a balanced diet to your child. Choose foods from all the five major food groups -- cereals, fruits, vegetables, meat and meat products, and milk and milk products.

• Limit the number of snacks your child eats. Each time he eats food, acids attack teeth for 20 minutes or more. For snacks, use nutritious foods, such as cheese, raw vegetables or yoghurt. Ideally, set regular snack times to avoid constant exposure to cavity causing foods.

• Sweets like candy or cookies can lead to tooth decay as they tend to stick to the teeth for a long time and are therefore harmful. Plaque thrives on sugar, turning it into acids that eat away at the enamel. Avoid these as much as possible.

• Sugar from fruits and fruit juices are equally harmful if they are allowed to stay in the mouth for long. Starches and fruits, however, are a necessary part of a child's diet, so, to avoid tooth decay, give them to your child only at meal time. During a meal, more saliva is released which helps in washing food from the mouth, thus reducing the effect of acid.

• Inculcate the habit of washing the mouth after every meal or snack. The natural fluoride in water will help your child's teeth.

• Calcium is a must for your child's teeth and bones. He gets his recommended daily dose from foods like milk, orange juice and leafy greens (spinach, broccoli, mustard greens, yogurt, cheese, cottage cheese). Make sure his calcium requirement is met at all costs.

• Teach him to brush twice a day with fluoride toothpaste. Make him use dental floss to clean in between the teeth.

Preventive Dentistry

Your child should get regular dental checkups after all his 20 baby teeth have appeared. The sooner you visit a dentist the better the chance of preventing dental diseases. Visit a dentist every six months or at least annually. Some children, however, need more frequent visits because of increased risk of tooth decay or malformed teeth.

Children with a healthy mouth chew more easily and gain more nutrients from food. They have a better chance of general health, because disease in the mouth can endanger the rest of the body. It also gives them confidence in their appearance. Taking care of this aspect of your child's development is your responsibility and one that requires only some commitment and basic knowledge.

Effective study skills

2008-09-01T22:03:00.000-07:00

Effective study skills

WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO STUDY? WHAT WILL WORK FOR YOU? SHOULD YOU ADOPT THE TECHNIQUES THAT WORK FOR OTHERS? WHAT IF YOU ARE DISTRACTED BY THE TV OR FEEL LIKE CHATTING WITH FRIENDS? TIPS ON HOW TO STUDY FOR THE BEST RESULTS

NO two people study the same way, and there is no doubt that what works for one person may not work for another. However, there are some general techniques that seem to produce good results.
Your success in high school and college is dependent on your ability to study effectively and efficiently. For best results, effective study skills must be practised. The results of poor study skills are wasted time, frustration, and low or failing grades. It's your life, your time, and your future, plan appropriately.

STUDY TECHNIQUES

Active involvement in reading the text is important for comprehending the material. One frequently suggested method for reading textbooks is the SQ3RT method. Mastering this technique will help you increase your grasping power dramatically. SQ3RT consists of the following steps:

S=SURVEY

Briefly survey the chapter, noting the divisions, headings, sub headings, captions, graphs or maps, tables and figures. Read the chapter summary. This provides an overview of the chapter content and a framework for organising the material.

Q = QUESTION

Turn each section heading into a question that you want answered. Also, try to guess questions that might appear on the exam.

R = READ:

Read the chapter, section by section, trying to answer your questions. Read with full understanding, answer the questions at the end of chapters and note all the underlined, italicised, bold printed words. Reduce your speed for difficult passages.

R = RECITE

After you have read a section, orally ask yourself questions about what you have just read. Answer the questions and state the main points verbally. You may also write down the answers and key points for later reference.

R = REVIEW

Briefly look back over the material to make sure you have included all the main points. Reflect on the meaning and application of the major points. Refine your mental organisation and begin building memory. The review can be done in small chunks of time as you wait between classes or have some time to spare while waiting for friends or between classes. Engaging in short periods of intensive concentration is a very efficient study method.

T = TEST

After a few days, test yourself on whatever you have learnt. Testing is one of the most important points because if you are not able to recollect something, you have a chance to learn it again. If you do not test, you may remain under the false impression that you know it very well.

THE VALUE OF A SCHEDULE

Before you even begin to think about the process of studying, you must develop a schedule. If you don't have a schedule or plan for studying, then you will not have any way of allocating your valuable time when the unexpected comes up. It’s up to you to learn how to develop a schedule that meets your needs, revise it if necessary and most important, follow it. All schedules should be made with the idea that they can be revised. A good schedule, if properly managed, assigns time where time is needed, but you've got to want to do it.

VARY YOUR STUDY ACTIVITIES

Varying activity would reduce boredom. Read and take notes for a while, formulate questions and answers for a time, recite and review to break the monotony. Another example is to do math problems for awhile, then read another subject, review that subject, and then go back to math.

READING TO UNDERSTAND

You can “read” something at many different levels. For example, you might be holding a book in front of your face while you’re actually watching other people. Or you might “read” because your teacher asked you to, so you just sort of look at the words and sentences and then close the book. You may also be reading because you are forced by your parents to study. You might read by rushing through because you have to finish the portion. One of the most common mistakes students do is to read without understanding. To really read something, you should set out with the goal of understanding what the words and sentences mean. You must learn to read with a purpose. One way is to test yourself on the material you’ve read. Imagine what questions a teacher might ask you from that lesson. If you can come up with the questions (and the answers too), you’ve been paying attention to what you’ve read. If not, it’s time to read again.

GUIDELINES FOR EFFECTIVE STUDY

• Be specific about what you want to accomplish (For example, complete exercise of chapter 8, not study biology, it's too broad).

• Manage daydreaming or distracting thoughts. This occurs when your mind has to choose between something pleasurable and something demanding. Use your will power to stop distracting thoughts and refocus on your studies.

• If you frequently think of things that distract you from your work, write down these thoughts on a piece of paper and once you are done with your studies, think only about them for the next ten minutes. Once you give the thought the attention it requires, it would bother you less.

• Resist the desire to snack, get up, watch TV or phone friends. Reward yourself when you succeed in resisting.

• Follow a schedule: eight hours of sleep per night, sufficient activity, etc. Lack of sleep, lack of food, excessive fatigue, high stress and personal problems can cause a lack of concentration.

• Address personal problems before studying or note it on paper and talk to someone trustworthy to unburden yourself. Any kind of emotional disturbance is one of the major causes of lack of concentration.

• You can prepare yourself to succeed in your studies. One of the most important things is to take responsibility for yourself, to recognize that in order to succeed you need to make decisions about your priorities, your time, and your resources. Follow up on the priorities you have set for yourself, and don't let others or other interests, distract you from your goals.

DAD"S BLESSINGS

2008-08-31T09:41:00.001-07:00

EIGHT LIES OF A MOTHER - Inspiring one ...

2008-08-31T09:14:00.000-07:00

The story began when I was a child; I was born as a son of a poor family. Even for eating, we often got lack of food. Whenever the time for eating, mother often gave me her portion of rice. While she was removing her rice into my bowl, she would say 'Eat this rice, son. I'm not hungry'.

That was Mother's First Lie

When I was getting to grow up, the persevering mother gave her spare time for fishing in a river near our house, she hoped that from the fishes she got, she could gave me a little bit nutritious food for my growth. After fishing, she would cook the fishes to be a fresh fish soup, which raised my appetite. While I was eating the soup, mother would sit beside me and eat the rest meat of fish, which was still on the bone of the fish I ate. My heart was touched when I saw it. I then used my chopstick and gave the other fish to her. But she immediately refused it and said 'Eat this fish, son. I don't really like fish.'

That was Mother's Second Lie.

Then, when I was in Junior High School, to fund my study, mother went to an economic enterprise to bring some used-matches boxes that would be stuck in. It gave her some money for covering our needs. As the winter came, I woke up from my sleep and looked at my mother who was still awoke, supported by a little candlelight and within her perseverance she continued the work of sticking some used-matches box. I said, 'Mother, go to sleep, it's late, tomorrow morning you still have to go for work. ' Mother smiled and said 'Go to sleep, dear. I'm not tired.'

That was Mother's Third Lie.

At the time of final term, mother asked for a leave from her work in order to accompany me. While the daytime was coming and the heat of the sun was starting to shine, the strong and persevering mother waited for me under the heat of the sun's shine for several hours. As the bell rang, which indicated that the final exam had finished, mother immediately welcomed me and poured me a glass of tea that she had prepared before in a cold bottle. The very thick tea was not as thick as my mother's love, which was much thicker. Seeing my mother covering with perspiration, I at once gave her my glass and asked her to drink too. Mother said 'Drink, son. I'm not thirsty!'.

That was Mother's Fourth Lie.

After the death of my father because of illness, my poor mother had to play her role as a single parent. By held on her former job, she had to fund our needs alone. Our family's life was more complicated. No days without sufferance. Seeing our family's condition that was getting worse, there was a nice uncle who lived near my house came to help us, either in a big problem and a small problem. Our other neighbors who lived next to us saw that our family's life was so unfortunate, they often advised my mother to marry again. But mother, who was stubborn, didn't care to their advice, she said 'I don't need love.'

That was Mother's Fifth Lie.

After I had finished my study and then got a job, it was the time for my old mother to retire. But she didn't want to; she was sincere to go to the marketplace every morning, just to sell some vegetable for fulfilling her needs. I, who worked in the other city, often sent her some money to help her in fulfilling her needs, but she was stubborn for not accepting the money. She even sent the money back to me. She said 'I have enough money.'

That was Mother's Sixth Lie.

After graduated from Bachelor Degree, I then continued my study to Master Degree. I took the degree, which was funded by a company through a scholarship program, from a famous University in America . I finally worked in the company. Within a quite high salary, I intended to take my mother to enjoy her life in America . But my lovely mother didn't want to bother her son, she said to me 'I'm not used to.'

That was Mother's Seventh Lie.

After entering her old age, mother got a flank cancer and had to be hospitalized. I, who lived in miles away and across the ocean, directly went home to visit my dearest mother. She lied down in weakness on her bed after having an operation. Mother, who looked so old, was staring at me in deep yearn. She tried to spread her smile on her face; even it looked so stiff because of the disease she held out. It was clear enough to see how the disease broke my mother's body, thus she looked so weak and thin. I stared at my mother within tears flowing on my face. My heart was hurt, so hurt, seeing my mother on that condition. But mother, with her strength, said 'Don't cry, my dear. I'm not in pain.'

That was Mother's Eight Lie.

After saying her eighth lie, She closed her eyes forever!

A MOTHERS LOVE

2008-08-30T20:10:00.001-07:00

A little boy came up to his mother in the kitchen one evening while she was fixing supper, and handed her a piece of paper that he had been writing on. After his Mom dried her hands on an apron, she read it, and this is what it said:

For cutting the grass: $5.00
For cleaning up my room this week: $1.00
For going to the store for you: $.50
Baby-sitting my kid brother while you went shopping: $.25
Taking out the garbage: $1.00
For getting a good report card: $5.00
For cleaning up and raking the yard: $2.00
Total owed: $14.75

Well, his mother looked at him standing there, and the boy could see the memories flashing through her mind. She picked up the pen, turned over the paper he'd written on, and this is what she wrote:

For the nine months I carried you while you were growing inside me:
No Charge

For all the nights that I've sat up with you, doctored and prayed for you:
No Charge

For all the trying times, and all the tears that you've caused through the years:
No Charge

For all the nights that were filled with dread, and for the worries I knew were ahead:
No Charge

For the toys, food, clothes, and even wiping your nose:
No Charge

Son, when you add it up, the cost of my love is:
No Charge.

When the boy finished reading what his mother had written, there were big tears in his eyes, and he looked straight at his mother and said, "Mom, I sure do love you." And then he took the pen and in great big letters he wrote: "PAID IN FULL".

Lessons:

· You will never how much your parents worth till you become a parent

· Be a giver not an asker, especially with your parents. there is a lot to give, besides money.

Advice: IF your mom is alive and close to you, give her a big kiss and ask her for forgiveness. If she is far away, call her. if she passed away, pray for her.

From rote learning to creative learning

2008-08-30T19:44:00.001-07:00

SCHOOLS ARE IMPARTING MEMORY-ENHANCING TECHNIQUES TO IMPROVE RETENTION,

WHILE most educationists have their concerns about rote learning, they also agree to the fact that certain subjects do require mugging up concepts. For instance, not all mathematics or physics formulae can be understood and even learning of languages does involve rote methods. Remembering dates in history was never easy, so what is the solution?
   To this end, a 'memory lab' was recently launched at the Mann Public School, Holambi, which aims to make learning simpler and quicker using 'memory enhancing techniques.' This is the world's 22nd and NCR's first memory lab which was launched recently by Biswaroop Roy Chowdhury, a world record holder for memory and the brain behind the concept.
   Says Chowdhury: "It is an attempt to shift from rote learning to creative learning. I have introduced concepts, which do not involve cramming. Once students understand our concepts, they will remember them for life."
   The lab has 15 equipment, which can be used for 27 experiments in various subjects. Students need an initial training for a period of 30-45 days on learning methods to be able to use these equipment. Once they get familiar they can easily 'memorise' concepts.
   Chowdhury emphasised that the use of colours and pictures helps in better retention. Thus, his equipment makes judicious use of the same. Subsequently the magnetic number system, the history colour system, the geography map grid or even the 3D grid for learning countries' capitals, have all been carefully designed to make memorising easy.
   One of the important features of memory lab is the 'Neurobic Machine' or the happiness testing machine invented by Chowdhury and B K Atal Bihari Malik, founder of Brain Research Institute, Bhubaneswar. The USP of the machine is that it can test the mental state of a person. The lab also consists of a memory reference library having around 25 books on memory techniques for various subjects and mind methods for good health.

MATHEMATICAL HAT

In a similar attempt, Pradeep Kumar from Magical Methods, a concept based on Vedic maths, is teaching concepts of geometrical shapes to children aged between five to seven years and applied geometry to children aged between 12 to 15 years, using a mathematical hat.
   Says Kumar: "Geometrical shapes are taught to children from the very beginning but they see it in their books in the form of pictures. Pictures are in two dimensions whereas in real life, most of the things are in three dimensions due to which they find it hard to recognise shapes when they actually encounter them in real life."
   He adds: "While working with mathematical hat, children can actually feel the shape. They can wear mathematical hat on their head. They can dismantle and join it again. This lets them learn about triangle, rectangle, square, circle, cylinder, pentagon and hexagon. And when they manipulate things themselves, they tend to learn these concepts for life."
   Kumar has designed four different types of mathematical hats including those for teaching concepts of geometrical shapes and properties of triangles, circles and quadrilaterals. He has also devised various innovative games through which students can comprehend concepts easily.

IN CLASSROOMS

Most schools are making use of interactive teaching learning materials (TLMs) as they believe in the theory that students learn better when they can visualise, manipulate and explore rather than passively listening to a teacher.
   Repeated studies have shown that a multisensory approach enriches internal memory and facilitates recall of information, says Sumitra Ramji, a counsellor. "Using pictures, sounds, music and interacting with students to find out what it feels or looks like, stimulates different senses."
   She adds: "Creative dramatics or role play activities address the problem situations and helps to re-explore ideas and interpretations among other things. Assisting students with mindmaps and flowcharts facilitates better understanding, gives structure to the topic, benefits recall and summarises important information clearly and concisely. By using different modalities, we stimulate different areas of the brain, which in turn facilitates information processing and recall when needed."

Are textbooks child-centred?

2008-08-30T19:42:00.000-07:00

Are textbooks child-centred?

TEXTBOOKS play a key role in socialisation of the child — through them a child vicariously experiences the world. Thus, the publishers and authors who select the text have a great responsibility. However, a survey of the textbook market in India would probably reveal:
   Textbooks, in general, are overloaded with information, facts and figures
   Most textbooks may profess to abide by the guidelines enshrined in the National Curriculum Framework (NCF) 2005. But, while they adopt the themes as examples, their approach remains archaic, ie to disseminate information to the child
   There is hardly any scope for the child to explore, investigate or question the text. The content is sacrosanct and can no way be wrong or interpreted differently by the child. Thus, the text is closed and not open to subjective interpretations
   Little effort is made to embed learning in a social context. So, a mathematics textbook shall have operations devoid of context, a social science or science text shall sequentially unfold information
   Gender sensitivity, mental health, life skills, peace education are key words picked up from NCF 2005 and exploited only as marketing tools

A PERSPECTIVE

There is a need to delve into the sociological, psychological and pedagogical impact of the text before publishing. NCF 2005 clearly emphasises the importance of a trial of books to assess the content and context validity. It states: 'It may be a good idea for the initial lessons to be piloted, ie to be taught on a trial basis, with the textbook writer observing the transaction in the class while also receiving feedback from both teacher and students. This is also important when innovating with the textbook content in order to understand and place them within the realities of the classroom and teacher preparation.'
   The new NCERT textbooks have been a sincere effort in this regard. The textbooks are an apt example of child-centred text that is well researched. They integrate the cultural milieu of the child and encourage inquiry; draw abstracts of children's literature published by NBT, CBT, Eklavya and others; and engage children. Some efforts in this direction have also been made by private publishers, who made books skill based, integrated text thematically, incorporated relevant case studies, life skills, etc.
   The presentation of the books is changing with some exploration projects, vivid illustrations, comic strips, stories, etc. However, by and large, the approach remains interventionist with innovation representing only an added feature. One must remember that a child doesn't need fragmented bits of information in a better layout, what he/she needs is an integrated curriculum. So, while such new textbooks seem like 'old wine in a new bottle,' the need in reality is for 'new wine' — a new text, the content that generates in a classroom in sync with the child's interest. Such a curriculum would be creative, innovative and worth teaching.
   It is important for parents to be critically aware of child-centred text. Intelligent questioning and reading educational research is important. If parents are not well informed, then there is little scope for innovation. As consumers, it is important to create a 'demand' and the publishers will 'supply.' This is how the market forces operate and how the face of Indian education system can change. All that is needed is a happy child and the joy of learning.

SOME SUGGESTIONS

Curriculum progression:
Evaluate the learning outcomes in the beginning and end of the book. Question whether the book provides necessary scaffold to the learner to gain competencies as conceptualised. Vertical progression also needs to be evaluated. How a concept progresses through class I, II, III and so on. Progression needs to be observed in the skills and the level of reasoning, not merely in adding new concepts.
Relevance of text: A child needs to enjoy the immediate benefits of learning and, thus, something that is linked to the daily life. Concepts like money, weights and measures, can be understood well through examples of a market or interviewing a grocer.
Approach: Textbooks, in general, have an informative tone. More narratives like stories and personal experiences; persuasive writing like ads and editorials; procedural writing like recipes and experiments; and transactional texts like interviews and invitations should be integrated into the textbook.

When and How to Stop Breastfeeding

2008-08-25T18:20:00.000-07:00

When breastfeeding your child it can be sometimes quite an issue to stop breastfeeding, especially if your child is accustom to being breastfed, it is important that you try not to upset the balance by simply stop breastfeeding. You have to take small steps towards shifting from breast milk to normal milk.

Breast milk is good for a child at early stages but eventually it gets to a point in which is does not matter whether or not the child takes breast milk or regular milk. But it is very important that when you are changing from breast milk to regular milk that you transition it slowly so that there are no upsets along the way.

A good way to start when stopping breastfeeding is to breastfeed less. Still breastfeed your child of course, but cut down their daily intake. Just make sure that when you are doing it you are making sure that your child is happy and not feeling uncomfortable as a result. If you continue to do this, eventually your child will get used to it and feel at ease with the current regime of feeding.

You can then move onto the next step, this is a great step for moving away from breastfeeding. Try and lessen the amount you breastfeed your child, but also try to put some breast milk into a bottle and use it to feed your child. This is a very effective method as it shows your child that it can get the same milk without breastfeeding. It may take some time for your child to adjust to this but after time I can guarantee that it will come into effect and your child will begin to readjust itself.

This then leads onto the next step, this is a big step since it is the transition from breast milk to regular milk, of course it is completely up to you as to whether you give your child breast milk or regular milk, but this is an optional step if you want your child to have regular milk instead of breast milk. When feeding your child the bottled breast milk you should try and slowly adjust and switch between regular milk and breast milk, mixing it together has been known to work sometimes, and by lowering the amount of breast milk you can in effect just give your child regular milk without it noticing a big difference. There are many tactics and strategies you can use to approaching this situation, but always remember to take it nice and slowly to ensure that there are no hiccups along the way.

Then, hopefully after this process you will have successfully moved away from breastfeeding. Of course, you can still feed your child breast milk if you prepare it in a bottle in advance, but it will eventually get to a point where you will find it easier to use regular milk. It is common that too much breast feeding can lead to discomforts in the breast especially if you breastfeed your child on a daily basis. So hopefully, no matter what your current situation is, this guide should hopefully have helped you.

Brush Your Teeth—It's Good for Your Heart

2008-08-24T02:01:00.000-07:00

Brush Your Teeth—It's Good for Your Heart

Mom's constant reminders to brush your teeth may be helping your heart. Good oral hygiene aids in preventing plaque build-up that characterizes both cardiac and gum diseases.

"Gum Disease"

The primary form of periodontal disease occurs when bacteria invade the gums, bones, and tissue that support the teeth. More than 75% of adults over age 35 suffer from periodontal disease, but most don't realize it until substantial damage has already occurred. Often painless, gum disease progresses relentlessly: gums separate from teeth, pockets form and deepen, and bacteria-produced toxins destroy tissue. While in its earliest stage, known as gingivits , professional dental care and good oral hygiene can reverse the periodontal siege.

For hundreds of years, people have recognized a connection between oral infections and systemic conditions. More recent investigations have found an association between gum disease and cardiovascular disease, low birth-weight babies, respiratory infections, and diabetes. One study found people with periodontal bone loss had twice the chance of fatal heart disease. The exact mechanism that increases cardiovascular risk remains murky, but experts believe bacteria from the chronic gum infection enter the bloodstream and cause white blood cells (which fight infections) to release materials that create a build-up of fatty deposits and clots in the arteries.

Prevention

"Brush inner, outer, and chewing surfaces at least twice daily with a soft-bristled brush held at a 45° angle. Some people find electric brushes easier to use.

Floss at least once daily, gently guiding the floss between teeth. While holding floss taut and curved around each tooth, slide the floss up and down. Continue, using a clean section of floss for each tooth.
Obtain professional dental cleaning every six months, more often if you are prone to plaque or gingivitis. "It's probably the best investment an adult can make in terms of preventing periodontal disease and decay," Caton says.
Ask for an annual periodontal screening and assessment of the degree to which gum tissue has pulled away from teeth.

Risk Factors

Several factors can place you at increased risk for periodontal disease.

Hormones

Birth control pills, hormone replacement therapy, pregnancy, puberty, and menstrual cycles all raise estrogen levels. "The receptor cells on periodontal tissues are sensitive to estrogen, which causes an exaggerated reaction to bacteria left after brushing," Caton explains. What this means is that you should be scrupulously attentive to tooth brushing and flossing under these conditions.

Medications

Some blood pressure medications and epilepsy drugs create an overgrowth of gum tissue, especially in people with an existing gum condition. Bacteria can easily accumulate in the enlarged gums and start to destroy the tissues that support the teeth.

Smoking

Scientists have accumulated overwhelming evidence that smoking increases the risk of periodontal disease. In addition, a recent study at the University at Buffalo School of Dental Medicine found passive, in-home exposure to tobacco smoke increased the risk of gum detachment and bleeding as well as severe periodontal disease by 70%.

Alcohol

The same university found heavy drinking upped the odds. Senior researcher Sara G. Grossi, DDS, says the risk of periodontal disease increased from 10% to 20%, 30%, and then 40% as alcohol consumption rose from five drinks per week to 10, 15, and 20.

Diet

The body has a harder time fighting infection without proper nutrients. University at Buffalo researchers recently discovered that low levels of antioxidant vitamins increased periodontal risk, attributing the findings to the body's need for antioxidants to maintain homeostasis and control bacterial damage.

Stress

Keeping emotions on an even keel will help, too. People confronted with stressful situations often become distracted and cut corners on hygiene habits. In addition, not coping with stress reduces the normal functioning of the immune system

Symptoms

Although insidious at first, gum disease will steadily become worse without treatment. The American Academy of Periodontology says symptoms include:

Gums pulling away from the teeth
Swollen, red, or tender gums
Gums that bleed with brushing or flossing
Bad breath
Loose or missing teeth
A change in bite or the fit of partial dentures
Pus between the tooth and gum

If you notice any of these symptoms, contact your dentist for a referral or call a periodontist directly.

Treatment

Often in its earliest stages, good oral hygiene and frequent professional cleaning will clear up the condition. If not, a periodontist can remove plaque from below the gum line and smooth or plane the tooth root to enable the gum to reattach. With more advanced cases, surgery may be required to clean up the infected area and rebuild damaged bone.

Often periodontists will add a course of antimicrobial therapy—pastes, gels, or polymers applied topically, or antibiotic pills to eliminate more aggressive bacteria. The specialists may also order Periostat, a pill that decreases the concentration of destructive enzymes called collagenases around the teeth and protects the tissue from additional damage. Treatment can prevent further deterioration associated with periodontal disease.

40 Infallible Reasons Why You Should Never Vaccinate Infants.

2008-08-23T10:17:00.000-07:00

40 Reasons Why You Should Never Vaccinate Infants:

- Jagannath Chatterjee.(Fighting Vaccines Since 1985).

There is no scientific study to determine whether vaccines have really prevented diseases. Rather disease graphs show vaccines have been introduced at the fag end of epidemics when the disease was already in its last stages. In case of Small Pox the vaccine actually caused a great spurt in the incidence of disease killing thousands before public outcry led to its withdrawal.
There are no long-term studies on vaccine safety. Very short-term unscientific tests are carried out where the vaccinated subjects are checked against another group who are given another vaccine. Technically the tests should be carried out against a non-vaccinated group. No one really knows what protocols are followed at such industry-sponsored trials.
There has never been any attempt to compare a vaccinated population against a non vaccinated population to know what vaccines are doing to the children and the society.
The child receives not one but many vaccines. There are no tests to determine the effects of multiple vaccines.
There is no scientific basis for vaccinating infants. As per senior doctors quoted by the Times of India, "Children suffer from less that 2% of vaccine preventable illnesses but 100% of the vaccines are targeted towards them." The vaccine pioneers who have recommended abundant caution before vaccinating the population have never advocated Mass vaccinations.
Children are vaccinated simply because parents can be frightened to forcefully vaccinate their children. Vaccinating infants is the most profitable business both for the manufacturers as well as the doctors.
The Government of India has come out with a quarter page advertisement in The Hindu warning parents not to vaccinate beyond the Government approved vaccines. Parents have been advised against vaccinating in private clinics and hospitals.
The Orissa Chapter of the Indian Association of Pediatricians has admitted in a letter to the CM, Orissa, that private clinics and hospitals are ill equipped to store vaccines and warned parents not to vaccinate upon the advise of private practitioners and hospitals.
ALL THE VACCINE INGREDIENTS ARE EXTREMELY TOXIC IN NATURE.
Vaccines contain heavy metals, cancer causing substances, toxic chemicals, live and genetically modified viruses, contaminated serum containing animal viruses and foreign genetic material, extremely toxic decontaminants and adjuvants, untested antibiotics, none of which can be injected without causing any harm.
The mercury, aluminum and live viruses in vaccines is behind the huge epidemic of autism (1 in 10 worldwide as per doctors in the USA), a fact that has been admitted by the US Vaccine Court.
The CDC of USA, the vaccine watchdog, has publicly admitted that its much-publicized 2003 study denying any link between vaccines and autism, is flawed. The Chief of CDC Dr Gerberding has confessed to the media (CNN) that vaccines can cause "autism like symptoms". The Autism epidemic is found only in those countries that have allowed mass vaccinations.
In the year 1999, the US Government instructed vaccine manufacturers to remove mercury from vaccines "with immediate effect". But mercury still remains a part of many vaccines. The vaccines with mercury were never recalled and were given to children up to the year 2006. "Mercury free" vaccines contain 0.05mcg of mercury, enough to permanently damage a infant.
IN INDIA NO ATTEMPT HAS BEEN MADE TO ENSURE THAT MERCURY AND OTHER HEAVY METALS ARE REMOVED FROM VACCINES SIMPLY BECAUSE IT WOULD MAKE VACCINES COSTLIER.
In a reply to then President Sri Abdul Kalam, the Health Ministry informed, "mercury is required to make the vaccines safe". To the authors query that "what are these vaccines that it requires the second most dangerous neurotoxin, mercury, to make them safe?", there was no reply.
Mercury used in vaccines is second in toxicity only to the radioactive substance, Uranium. It is a neurotoxin that can damage the entire nervous system of the infant in no time.
Mercury accumulates in fat. The brain being made entirely of fat cells, most of the mercury accumulates there giving rise to the peculiar symptoms of the autistic children.
The mercury used in vaccines is ethyl mercury. According to Indian doctors this is 1000 times more toxic than the usual methyl mercury.
The aluminum present in vaccines makes the mercury, in any form, 100 times more toxic.
As per an independent study aluminum and formaldehyde present in vaccines can increase the toxicity of mercury, in any form, by 1000 times.
As per a Tehelka article on Autism, children are receiving 250 times more mercury through vaccines than they can possibly tolerate. The same article states that if one considers the WHO limit for mercury in water, they are receiving 50,000 times the limit. The limits set, incidentally, are for adults and not infants.
Autism in India has emerged as the most rapidly growing epidemic amongst children. From 1 in 500 it has steadily climbed to 1 in 37 today. As per Indian doctors, "You can go to any class of any school today and find an autistic child."
Autism is a permanent disability that affects the child physically, mentally and emotionally. It makes the child loose social contact. It impedes both the physical and mental growth of the child. It destroys the brain causing severe memory and attention problems. According to vaccine researcher Dr Harris Coulter, vaccines cause children to become pervert and criminal. All the school shootings by the children in the USA are by autistic children. Vaccines can cause more harm that even the medical community privately acknowledges.
Autistic children also suffer from severe bowel disorders. As per Dr Andrew Wakefield, this is due to the vaccine strain live measles virus in the MMR vaccine. Nearly all children become fully autistic after the MMR shot.
The DPT also causes children to regress giving rise to fears that multiple live virus vaccines are an important cause behind autism. If three live viruses can cause so much harm we can well imagine what today's five and seven viruses vaccines will do to children.
Before the autism epidemic, it is already well known that vaccines have caused the cancer epidemic in today's society. Both the Small Pox and the Oral Polio Vaccine are made from monkey serum. This serum has helped many cancer causing monkey viruses, 60 found so far, to enter the human blood stream.
It is also known that it is the use of green monkey serum in vaccines that has led to the transfer of the Sivian Immune deficiency Virus (SIV) from monkeys into humans. The SIV and the HIV that causes AIDS are very similar.
Not only AIDS, a blood cancer in infants (Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia) that is affecting children in thousands is also due to the extremely toxic nature of vaccine ingredients.
Infantile jaundice and also infantile diabetes is also scientifically connected to the toxic vaccines.
The live polio viruses used in the Oral Polio Vaccine has caused Vaccine Attributed Paralytic Polio in more than 65,000 children as per doctors of the Indian Medical Association. In the USA this vaccine has caused polio 16 years after administration. The OPV has also let loose a new strain of polio in both India and Africa. The OPV is banned in other countries.
Vaccines contain serum from not only chimpanzees and monkeys but also from cows, pigs, chickens, eggs, horses, and even human serum and tissues extracted from aborted fetuses.
Deaths and permanent disability from vaccines is very common and known by the medical community. They are instructed by the Government to keep quiet and not to associate such cases with vaccines.
Many doctors argue that diseases during childhood are due to the body exercising its immune system. Suppressing these diseases causes the immune system to remain undeveloped causing the various autoimmune disorders like diabetes and arthritis that have become epidemics today.
Vaccines suppress the natural immunity and the body does not have natural antibodies anymore. The mothers milk therefore does not contain natural antibodies and can no longer protect the child against illnesses.
In the USA vaccine adverse effects are recorded and the Government offers compensation of millions of dollars to victims (the most recent case in its Vaccine Court may have received upto $200 million in damages). The Indian Government simply refuses to acknowledge that vaccines can cause deaths and permanent disability.
It has been scientifically proven that vaccines cannot prevent disease. Vaccines try to create humoral (blood related immunity) whereas it has been found that immunity is developed at various levels, humoral as well as cellular. We still do not know enough about the human immune system and therefore should not interfere with it.
In the USA parents are informed about vaccine after effects and their consent has to be taken before vaccinating their children. In India the Government assures the population through massive advertising campaigns that vaccines are extremely safe. Parents refusing to vaccinate are threatened by the administration.
THERE IS NO SYSTEM OF TREATMENT TO TREAT A VACCINE DAMAGED CHILD. The parents have to run from one hospital to another. The Government turns a blind eye and refuses to even acknowledge the vaccine connection.
Medical doctors have challenged even the vaccines recommended by the Government of India. The BCG vaccine for tuberculosis has been extensively tested in India as long back as 1961 and found to be totally ineffective. The OPV is causing polio and other neurological and intestinal disorders in tens of thousands of Indian children. The Hep-B vaccine introduced recently is not meant for children at all, it is a vaccine for a sexually transmitted disease that should be targeted only at promiscuous adults. The tetanus vaccine contains both aluminum and mercury besides the tetanus toxoid. The doctors themselves avoid the DPT as it is one of the most toxic vaccines ever devised. The measles vaccine is a vaccine that regularly causes severe adverse effects and the health workers want it out.
The pediatricians are introducing dubious vaccines in India, which are being opposed by the doctors, politicians, and public in American and European countries. The Rotavirus vaccine, Hib vaccine, HPV vaccine and the various multi various vaccines being introduced without any kind of testing is only because the vaccine manufacturers and the doctors administering them want to ensure a good income from them. They care two hoots about medical ethics and the fate of the children who will receive these vaccines. Vaccines containing nano particles and viruses and also plant based genetically modified vaccines are being opposed by honest doctors worldwide.

The above points are not all exhaustive. If after reading all this you still want to vaccinate your child, please go ahead. You deserve a vaccine-damaged child.

Are You Spoiling Your Child?

2008-08-23T00:41:00.000-07:00

Babies need to be loved and held, so if you pick her up when she cries, you are certainly not spoiling her. She may cry more frequently because she knows you will hold her, and this may be a little demanding on you, but other than this concern there should be no reason for you not to pamper your baby to your heart's content. However, once your child reaches the age of two you would do well to be a little less indulgent.

"I don't like saying 'no' to my child."

Parents feel that their children may start loving them less if they say 'no' too often, and tend to give in to their child's every demand. This is a surefire way of spoiling your child. Instead of giving in to your child's demand at once or instantly refuting it, find a middle path. Speak to your child about what he wants, ask him why he wants it, and if you feel his demand is justified, then let him know the reasons you believe your child can have what he wants. Let your child be aware of the cost, and let him know that he has to behave in a certain way before he gets it.

Thus, though it isn't wise to refuse all your child's demands because it does hinder their self-confidence, you should avoid fulfilling all your child's demands immediately. Every once in a while you could ask your child to earn something that he wants in some way. Use gifts as incentives for your child to perform better, after all, that is the way life works and it helps if your child gets used to this at the outset.

Encourage your child to take up a part-time job when he is still young. While this is not so much the practice in India, it does wonders to develop a child's personality and make him more independent. It also helps him realize the value of money. If you have a family business, you could take him to the office and make him help out by doing clerical work. If your teenager wants to work as a salesperson in a shop, your first instinct may be to discourage it, but let your child do so for a few months, over the summer vacation. Summer jobs should always be encouraged.

"I want my child to enjoy luxuries that I didn't have."

Many parents, especially those didn't have many luxuries when growing up, want their children to enjoy the wealth that they worked so hard for. If you give your child everything he wants on demand, he will grow up believing the world owes him a living, and will find it hard to cope when realizes it doesn't.

"I avoid discussing money with my child."

Speak to your children about money, and make them aware of the true situation. Don't try and fool them into thinking you have less or more than you actually have. Often parents refuse to discuss how much they make with their children, which is not necessarily a good idea. If you let your child know how much you and your wife make, it gives him a better picture of the family finances, and it also helps him appreciate the value of money. Simply passing a vague statement like "You don't have to worry about it," is not the best way of handling this situation. Discuss money, household expenditure, salaries to staff and investments, with your children.

Nesting

2008-08-21T19:55:00.000-07:00

Nesting
What is Nesting?
Nesting is the term used to refer to an expectant mother's instinct which gives her a surge of energy which prompts her to clean and do various chores around her home. Nesting usually arises as the mother nears her due date.
Not all women will nest. The nesting process has no relation on how good a mother the woman will be.
What Does Nesting Feel Like?
Some women are nesting and are mentally unaware of it. Their nesting instincts may be subtle, yet they are going around their living quarters doing tasks in preparation for their child's birth. When nesting is subtle, it is thought to be because the woman may be energetic or active naturally, regardless of her pregnancy.
Other women report a surge of energy that is impossible to still. These women know they are nesting and they are unable to quell the surge of energy.
Thoughts about nesting will make some women nervous about their pending labor and delivery.
What Do Some Women Do When They Are Nesting?
Each woman will nest in a way that is unique to them. Below is a list of possible things a nesting mother do.

Clean out the cabinets
Mop the floor
Rearrange furniture
Clean out closets
Clean a child's nursery meticulously
Steam clean upholstery and carpets
Cleanthe bathroom
Stock the kitchen with food
Cook
While these may seem like normal household chores, when a woman is nesting, she will probably carry out the tasks more meticulously and persistently than usual.
Should a Woman Be Cautioned Against Nesting?
Nesting is normal and it is not hard on a woman's health unless she exhausts herself.
Pregnancy normally will hamper a woman from doing things which are truly too strenuous. However, if a woman is nesting and trying to push a piano across a room, it is probably best if she finds something else to do.
Does Nesting Mean that Labor Is Near?
It is virtually impossible to predict exactly when labor will begin. However, nesting is a good sign that it is soon. Nesting may occur a couple of weeks, or even a day, prior to the onset of labor.

Perspective

2008-08-21T10:36:00.001-07:00

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.

They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.

On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, 'How was the
trip?'

'It was great, Dad.'

'Did you see how poor people live?' the father asked.

'Oh yeah,' said the son.

'So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?' asked the father

The son answered:

'I saw that we have one dog and they had four.

We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.

We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.

Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.

We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.

We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.

We buy our food, but they grow theirs.

We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them.'

The boy's father was speechless.

Then his son added, 'Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are.'

Isn't perspective a wonderful thing?

Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!

Dad will never say

2008-08-21T09:56:00.000-07:00

Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear a Dad Say

10. Well, how 'bout that?... I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions.

9. You know Pumpkin, now that you're thirteen, you'll be ready for unchaperoned car dates. Won't that be fun?

8. I noticed that all your friends have a certain "up yours" attitude ... I like that.

7. Here's a credit card and the keys to my new car -- GO CRAZY.

6. What do you mean you wanna play football? Figure skating not good enough for you, son?

5. Your Mother and I are going away for the weekend ... you might want to consider throwing a party.

4. Well, I don't know what's wrong with your car. Probably one of those doo-hickey thingies -- you know -- that makes it run or something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever he asks.

3. No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring -- now quit your belly-aching, and let's go to the mall.

2. Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend.

1. Father's Day? aahh -- don't worry about that -- it's no big deal.

Benefits of Calcium, Calcium Rich Food and Calcium Deficiency

2008-08-02T18:55:00.001-07:00

Benefits of Calcium, Calcium Rich Food and Calcium Deficiency

Calcium is an essential dietary mineral for healthy bones and strong teeth. A constant blood calcium level is essential for the maintenance of the normal heartbeat, and for the usual functioning of nerves and muscles.

Advantages of calcium -

# Calcium ion is essential for a large variety of important physiological functions, including muscle contraction, nerve stimulation, hormonal release, cell membrane, permeability, proper enzyme function.

# Calcium is necessary to stabilize the activity of a number of proteins and enzymes. The binding of calcium ions is required for the activation of "vitamin K-dependent" clotting aspects in the blood coagulation process.

# Calcium, especially calcium derived from dairy products help adjust body fat.

# Calcium helps slow bone loss in postmenopausal women, may reduce premenstrual syndrome symptoms, and is associated with reduced threat of colorectal cancer.

# The body requires calcium to make strong teeth and healthy bones. The bones serve as the storage place for the body's calcium. They continuously release calcium into the bloodstream, and then keep replacing it as the body's requirement for calcium arises. When calcium intake is low, there is poor absorption; and there is a high probability of bone breakdown because the body uses up the stored calcium to perform normal biological functions.

# Calcium is also needed for muscle contraction and maintenance of cell membranes.

# Calcium supplements help alleviate mood swings, food cravings, pain, and bloating associated with premenstrual syndrome.

What is the recommended daily requirement of calcium?

Optimal calcium intake depends according to a person's age, sex, and ethnicity.

The U.S. Recommended Dietary Allowance for calcium is 1,000 milligrams per day - given for adults (except pregnant or lactating women) and children over 4 years of age.

It is about 1200 milligrams for individuals older than 50 years of age.

The calcium intake of vegans tends to be slightly below the recommended optimal amounts but the body does adapt to lower intakes. Since vegetarians have a slightly lower protein intake and rule out meat from their diet, encourages their bodies to retain calcium so their dietary need is relatively lower.

Sources of Calcium -

Dairy products (milk, yoghurt, cottage cheese, cheese) are the main sources of calcium. Individuals with lactose intolerance (people who cannot completely digest the milk sugar lactose) and those who are vegans tend to avoid or eliminate dairy products from their diet. We all know that it is important for vegetarians to meet calcium needs with alternative calcium sources.

Good vegan sources of calcium include tofu (if prepared from calcium sulphate), green leafy vegetables, dried figs, broccoli, seeds and nuts. Some soya milks, instant breakfast cereals are also fortified with calcium. Drinking water can provide as much as 200mg of calcium daily, as hard water contains a rich source of calcium.

Although most grains are not high in calcium, they do contribute calcium to the diet because they are consumed regularly and frequently.

What affects calcium absorption and excretion from the body?

Only 20-30% of calcium in the average diet is absorbed into the body, the rest gets excreted.

A high protein diet, especially based on animal foods, causes calcium loss in the body. The higher sulphur-to-calcium ratio of meat increases calcium excretion.

Calcium absorption can also be affected by the amount of calcium present in the body, amount of vitamin D presence (helps improve calcium absorption), age, pregnancy (intestinal calcium absorption increases during pregnancy), fibre content in diet etc. The amount of calcium consumed at one time such as in a meal is inversely related to the absorption rate.

Calcium excretion refers to the amount of calcium eliminated from the body through urine, feces and sweat. Calcium excretion is affected by factors such as amount of sodium, protein, caffeine and potassium in diet.

Calcium is lost in cooking some foods even under the best conditions.

To retain calcium:

* Foods are best cooked in a minimal amount of water.

* Cook food for the shortest possible time.

What does calcium deficiency lead to?

Osteoporosis: major cause of bone fractures in the elderly, especially women. Prevention includes an adequate intake of calcium throughout life, but especially in childhood and young adulthood; and reducing trigger factors such as smoking, heavy drinking and lack of physical exercise.

Diets high in protein and salt also increase calcium loss from the body. Post-menopausal women are more prone because they produce less oestrogen, which protects the skeleton in younger women.

Rickets is a childhood disorder involving softening and weakening of the bones. It is caused by lack of vitamin D, calcium, or phosphate. Deficiency of vitamin D leads to improper regulation of calcium and phosphate. Symptoms of rickets in children include delayed sitting, crawling, walking and the development of bowlegs

LOVE HAS NO LIMITS

2008-08-02T10:42:00.000-07:00

While Dad was polishing his new car,
his 4 yr old son picked stone & scratched lines on the side of the car.
In his anger, Dad took the child's hand & hit it many times, not
realizing he was using a wrench.
At the hospital, his child said "Dad when will my fingers grow back?"
Dad was so hurt.
He went back to car and kicked it a lot of times.
Sitting back he looked at the scratches, child wrote "I LOVE YOU DAD"

Anger and Love has no limits...

Breaking Family Ties That Bind

2008-07-31T06:25:00.001-07:00

When we really examine our fears about something, we sometimes notice that the fear we have is not based on our own experience. Often, if we trace our fear back to its source, we find that one of our parents may have handed it down to us. For example, your mother or father may have had an intense fear of lack of money, stemming from their own life experiences. If that fear was not resolved by the time you came into the picture, chances are you inherited it. Meanwhile, you may have no actual experience of lacking money, so being fearful doesn't make sense, and it may even block you from doing certain things you want to do.

Keeping in mind that your parents were only trying to protect you, and that most of the errors in judgment they made were made with the best intentions, it might be time to release this fear symbolically. You cannot resolve someone else's fear for them, but you can decide to let go of it on your own behalf. Whether your parents are still alive or not, it is best to do this in a symbolic way, using visualization and, if you like, ritual. One simple visualization involves inviting your parent to sit across from you in your heart space and sharing your desire to move on from this fear, letting them know that you will not carry it anymore. You may be surprised at the response you get, because it's possible they will be proud of you, grateful, and proud of your courage.

The more we do this deep inner work with our fears, the better we will be able to parent our own children without burdening them with fears that don't belong to them. Some of us will do as much of this work as we can before we become parents, while others will be working on this even as our children become adults. Either way, the effects will be felt, because once we break our ties to the fears of the past, our children's ties to those fears are greatly weakened, so it's important to remember that it's never too late.

CHILDREN AND ANGELS

2008-07-29T06:50:00.000-07:00

I have often felt that children are far closer to the angels than we adults are. They seem far more ready to share joy freely and to give love unconditionally to others. They seem to easily know how to celebrate life, laugh, smile, and embrace delight just as God meant for all of us to do. Nothing brought this point home to my heart more clearly than a story a friend of mine recently shared with me about her daughter.

Her daughter while mentally handicapped has a soul that shines brighter than a thousand suns. She loves everyone and is never afraid to express her affection to others. Once when she was at Church with her Mom it came time to give others the sign of peace. Now most people do this with a handshake or a gentle touch. This little Angel Child , however, wasn't one to hold back on her love. She turned around and gave a sweet, elderly lady next to her a huge hug full of both energy and love. Later after Church that same lady with tears in her eyes approached the girl's Mom and spoke to her. "My husband just died a week ago", she said. "I felt so alone that I was going to go home and take some pills to end my life today, but now thanks to your little girl I believe that there still is love in this world."

Our children can teach us so much about love. Our children can teach us so much about joy. Our children can teach us so much about life. Let us not ignore the lessons they give us every day. Let us instead learn from them and share more love and joy with others in our own lives. God loves us and put us here to love each other. Sometimes we forget this, but thankfully God is patient and forgiving with us. He never fails to send us joyous angels and happy children to guide us back to love again.

I'm shopping for Priyanka's B'day gift

2008-07-26T06:20:00.001-07:00

Harman is on a family holiday in Dubai..

"Just the four of us my dad, mom, my sister Rowena and me. We took off for a 5-days trip to Dubai. We all needed the break.

The last two years and particularly the last few weeks have been very stressful for all of us. So here we are, just chilling and shopping.

Actually the ladies are doing all the shopping. I'm just their bag boy, " says Harman sounding completely relaxed and far from the tense wreck that his well-wishers in the entertainment industry would like him to be.

"In the past two weeks (after the release of Love Story 2050) I've learnt so much about life. I think I'm much wiser now."

'Wise' Harman intends to go shopping in Dubai for his girlfriend Priyanka whose birthday is on the 18th.

"I don't know as yet what I'll get her. But girls like anything you give then in a gift-wrap and with a smile, trust me on that."

Have the courage to say 'no' to your children

2008-07-25T10:38:00.001-07:00

Train your children to digest disappointments, denials and refusals.

Modern life is not only competitive but also stressful in many aspects. Children have to gradually adapt themselves to this demanding environment at some point of time. This is exactly why parents need to train their young ones accordingly. Children must be taught to take a `no', not only from parents but also friends, teachers, neighbours and even strangers.

Discipline begins at home

Some parents tend to pamper children unreasonably. Abundance of anything, ranging from toys, games, sweets and chocolates, spoils children at a very young age. In fact, research has shown that children brought up in over-affluent families tend to lose their faculty of imagination. Since they have too much on their platter, it becomes difficult for them to yearn for anything. Therefore, parents should not bombard their children with more than what is needed. The need for this inherent discipline has to be internalized by parents themselves. Parents should be prepared to prepare their children for the rough and the smooth in life.

Never satisfy all demands

Although parents derive immense satisfaction from fulfilling their children's wishes, they should deliberately leave some wishes unfulfilled. If every whim and fancy of the child is entertained, the child grows up to be a very self-centered person. Even a single `no' can put him or her off balance. Such children take their whims to an illogical extent. For instance, if they fancy a person who does not reciprocate their feelings, they may get violent out of frustration. Or they might not be able to digest rejection in a job interview later in life. Over pampered children are also prone to acute depression mainly because they cannot take disappointments in the right spirit.

Never encourage comparisons

Parents should always discourage their child's tendency to compare his or her material assets with other children. For instance, if a child demands a toy merely because a neighbour has got a new one, such a craving should not be entertained. Such children end up constantly comparing themselves with other people. Parents have to curb this tendency at a very early stage.

Appeasement does not have long-term effect

In order to keep their daily routine hassle-free, parents tend to please children. However, overt appeasement has short-term gains. Children tend to lose respect for their parents. They look upon parents as mere scarecrows. The policy does not pay in the long run. Therefore parents should not enter into a popularity contest. They must have the courage to call a spade a spade.

Some parents tend to please children out of guilt. For instance, a working mother comes home late. She is harried. She does not have time for attending to the child's homework. The child asks for an ice cream after dinner. Despite knowing the fact that an ice cream can cause a bad throat, the mother gives in. The child is smart enough to know the reason behind the bribe/favour. This scenario is universally applicable. Therefore, parents should not let guilt get the better of them. They must have the courage to face the child's tantrums.

The Horrors of Homework

2008-07-25T08:22:00.000-07:00

Is it for parents or for children?

Today homework has become a nightmare for both parents and children. In a time when it seems that every child needs to be a superachiever to survive, the pressure on them to excel not just academically but otherwise is tremendous. While children have never been enthusiastic about doing homework in the first place, they now view homework as being the last straw that broke the camel's back as they try to juggle school, tuition classes and other extracurricular activities.

Tips for dealing with homework hassles

Appoint a specific time to do homework every day. Parents should try to ensure that they are around at this time so that they are on hand if they are needed.
Parents should find out the schedule of tests planned for the week and help their children organize their homework time so that they are well prepared.
Avoid power struggles. Confronted with a whining, tantrumatic child, a parent should first try to maintain her cool. She should try to lighten the atmosphere, offer help is she thinks the child needs it, or just leave the room, leaving the child to his own devices. But she should brook no arguments from the child and be uncompromising about the fact that the homework must be done, and done immediately.
Parents should regularly encourage their children and praise their efforts. When a child does well on a test, for instance, parents while applauding his achievement should remind him that doing his homework properly and being prepared made the difference.
Parents should make their children feel that they are interested in their work and offer to help if necessary. But at no point should parents do their children's work for them. This will adversely affect a child's motivation and initiative, as he will feel that at the slightest difficulty his parents will bail him out.
Remember that if a child is cheating on schoolwork and blindly copying homework from others, it may be a sign that she is feeling unduly pressured and afraid to admit that she cannot cope. In such a case, it is advisable that parents speak to the teacher or the school counselor.
Make provision for a special place in which the child can do her homework, as if it were her personal office.

In the Eye of the Beholder

2008-07-14T18:47:00.001-07:00

One night, my eight-year-old son, Zakariya, and I were scanning the TV listings for something to watch.

"Oooh, there's a beauty contest on," I said. Zakariya asked me what a beauty contest was, and I explained that it was a contest to choose the most beautiful woman in the world.

Then my son thrilled me by asking with complete sincerity, "Why aren't you in the contest, Mommy?"

Solution to teenage smoking problem

2008-07-13T08:22:00.000-07:00

Solution to teenage smoking problem

At last there comes up some solution for preventing a kid from having a life long addiction of smoking. Some serious research has been done by the scientists at the University of Utah; regarding the characteristic of being a life long smoker. The researchers have taken DNA samples of about 2,827 smokers. They made a vivid study over the changes in the genetic code called single nucleotide polymorphisms. This is something that is very much a part of nicotine addiction and that leads to a life long smoking practice. This research justifies the point that kids who have picked up smoking before 17 years of age are more into this addiction than those who have had it after 17.

This is indeed a good news, as now all the guardian can prevent their teenagers in getting into the whirlpool till 17. Once they are successful, there will be a hope of giving it up easily, if one gets addicted to smoking at a later stage in life. Researches of these types really deserve good appreciation.

I'm a JUNE Baby: WHAT BABY ARE YOU ???

2008-07-13T07:46:00.000-07:00

Replace the month in the subject with your own & forward this to everybody in your address book & to the person who sent it to you... I did! These are so adorable, don't ya think? I'll bet they fit your B-day/personality to a T; ...... and, then, maybe not! I just love the animated babies they have on here.
Enjoy!

What baby are you?

Jan	---------------JANUARY BABY-------------------- Pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive. Down-to-Earth. Stubborn. Repost this in 5 mins and you will meet someone new in 8 days that will perfectly balance your personality.
Feb	------- FEBRUARY BABY -------- Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexiest out of everyone. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble.. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Horny. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside.. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions. Repost this in 5 mins and you will talk to someone new and realize that you are a perfect match.
Mar	-----------------MARCH BABY -------------------- Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate Shy and Reserved. Secretive.. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Great kisser.. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others. If you repost this in the next 5 mins, you will meet your new love in 8 days.
Apr	------------------APRIL BABY ------------------- Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn.. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive. Positive attitude.. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh.. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and traveling. Systematic. Hot but has brains. If you repost this in 5 mins, a Cutie that's caught your eye will introduce themselves and you will realize that you are very much alike in the next 2 days.
May	-----------------MAY BABY ----------------- Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain).. Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing.. Loves Literature and the Arts. Loves traveling. Dislikes being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will become close to someone you do not speak to much in the next 4 days.
Jun	------------JUNE BABY ------------- You've got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have an a very attractive partner. A wicked hottie. It is also more than likely that you have a massive record collection. You have a great choice in films, and may one day Become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you've got the looks for it!!! In the next 6 days you will meet someone that may possibly become one of your closest friends, if you repost this in 5 minutes.
Jul	----------------JULY BABY -------------- Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly.. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Spazzy at times. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be with friends Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. Repost this in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost some way in the next 12 days
Aug	------------AUGUST BABY --------------- Outgoing personality. Takes risks. Feeds on attention. No self-control.. Kind hearted. Self confident. Loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. Easy to get along with and talk to. Has an "every thing's peachy" attitude. Likes talking and singing. Loves music. Daydreamer. Easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. Loves to be loved. Hates studying. In need of "that someone". Longs for freedom. Rebellious when withheld or restricted. Lives by "no pain no gain." Caring. Always a suspect. Playful. Mysterious. "Charming" or "beautiful" to everyone. Stubborn. Curious. Independent. Strong willed. A fighter. Repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your life sometime next month.
Sep	------------SEPTEMBER BABY --------------- Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand. If you do not repost this in the next 5 mins, someone very close to you will become mad at you in the next 8 days.
Oct	---------------OCTOBER BABY ------------------- Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the centre. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all Repost this in 5 mins or you will not meet the love of your life for 10 years.
Nov	---------------NOVEMBER BABY -------------------- Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent.. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, the greatest men are born in this month. If you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind.
Dec	---------------DECEMBER BABY --------------- This straight-up means yo u are the most good-looking person possible... better than all of these other months! Loyal and generous. Patriotic.. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand.. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Has that someone always on his/her mind. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Abiding. Able to show character. One guy/girl kind of person. Loveable. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves music.

Help Them Organize Their Writing

2008-07-10T08:14:00.000-07:00

Many supervisors and managers ask me for help when their employees can't organize information. Of course, organization depends on the document. But here are five solutions I offer supervisors and managers to help employees organize their messages.

Insist that every document get to the point within 50 words. Tell employees you won't read a document that doesn't get to the point right away.
Insist that employees use headings in reports, recommendations, and other messages to make information skimmable. Headings will force them to categorize information.
Allow just one main idea per paragraph. In disorganized messages, a mishmash of ideas packs each paragraph.
Allow just one idea per sentence. With just one idea in it, almost any sentence can get organized.
Limit the words per sentence--no more than 15 to 20 words on average. It's hard for short sentences to get out of hand.

Tips for Spoken English...........

2008-07-04T19:29:00.000-07:00

1. Read aloud in English for 15-20 minutes every day
Reading loudly helps in developing confidence.

2. Until you learn the correct intonation and rhythm of English, slow your speech down
If you speak too quickly, and with the wrong intonation and rhythm, people will have a hard time understanding you. Don't worry about your listener getting impatient with your slow speech - it is more important that everything you say be understood. When you read loudly, take a 3 second pause after every word that you read.

3. Think in English – 30 minutes daily
People who speak fluent English have a habit of thinking and speaking in English at the same time. Think “simple & short” sentences in English whenever you have free time.

4. Pronounce the ending of each word
Pay special attention to 'S' and 'ED' endings. This will help strengthen the mouth muscles when you speak English.

5. Record your own voice and listen for pronunciation mistakes
Many people hate to hear the sound of their voice and avoid listening to themselves speak. However, this is a very important exercise because doing it will help you become conscious of the mistakes you are making.

6. Observe the mouth movements of those who speak English well and try to imitate them
When you are watching television, observe the mouth movements of the speakers. Repeat what they are saying, while imitating the intonation and rhythm of their speech.

7. Be patient
You can change the way you speak but it won't happen overnight. People often expect instant results and give up too soon. You can change the way you sound if you are willing to put some effort into it.

kids jokes

2008-07-04T19:13:00.000-07:00

One night, a father passed by his son's room and heard his son praying: "God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma. Ta ta, Grandpa."

The father didn't quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next morning, they found Grandpa dead on the floor of a heart attack. The father reassured himself that it was just a coincidence, but was still a bit spooked.

The next night, he heard his son praying again: "God bless Mommy and Daddy. Ta ta, Grandma."

The father was worried, but decided to wait until morning. Sure enough, the next morning Grandma was on the floor, dead of a heart attack.

Really scared now, the father decided to wait outside his son's door the next night. And sure enough, the boy started to pray: "God bless Mommy. Ta ta, Daddy."

Now the father was crapping his pants. He stayed up all night, and went to the doctor's early the next day to make sure his health was fine. When he finally came home, his wife was waiting on the porch. She said, "Thank God you're here -- we could really use your help! We found milkman dead on our porch this morning!"

===============================================================

A boy was assigned a paper on childbirth. He asked his parents, "How was I born?"
"Well honey ..." said the slightly prudish parent, "the stork brought you to us."
"OH," said the boy. "Well, how did you and daddy get born?" he asked.
"Oh, the stork brought us too."
"Well how were grandpa and grandma born?" he persisted.
"Well darling, the stork brought them too!" said the parent.
Several days later, the boy handed in his paper to the teacher who read with confusion the opening sentence:
"This report has been very difficult to write due to the fact that there hasn't been a natural childbirth in my family for three generations."

===============================================================

A little kid asks his father, "Daddy, is God a man or a woman?"
"Both son. God is both."

After awhile the kid comes again and asks, "Daddy, is God black or white?"

"Both son, both."

"Daddy, does God love children?"

"Yes son, he loves all children."

The child returns a few minutes later and says, "Daddy, is Michael Jackson God?"

Caution, college ahead

2008-07-03T18:23:00.000-07:00

My just-out-of-school child joins college soon. I'm very nervous about the parent interviews. How do I prepare for them? Also, some of the teachers in a school are my friends. However, my other child is their ward, conversation inside and outside school gets a little awkward. How do I demonstrate to my child the difference between her "aunty" outside school and the "miss/ teacher" in school?
— Vikram Udyavar

Parenting is a full-time job without any manuals! And yet we have nurtured a great foundation of the next generation, though they need to be harnessed from time to time. And their intelligence is enhanced and cultivated at the various colleges and institutes that you will be called on to visit in these few weeks for your child's admissions.

Interviews of any kind do make all of us nervous but we've got to keep our wits and confidence about ourselves, especially when called to accompany our children to such meetings.

• It is essential to answer all questions with truth and sincerity. Don't attempt to appear what you are not, particularly in terms of social status and standing.

• This will also indicate to your child that no matter what, you are proud of who you are. The child will adopt these qualities and will lean upon when faced with peer pressure.

• You will be asked questions about the nature and quality of relationship with your child. While you must be honest, do know that what and how you frame your responses will set the tone of how the child will be treated by the school or college staff and peers. It is necessary to keep the child's respect, but at the same time, diplomatically indicate the general shortcomings s/he may have. So, instead of saying your child is lazy, say s/he needs to be motivated.

• Impress upon the school/college the awareness and remedial actions that you intend to implement to improve these shortcomings. This will prove that you are involved in your child's education and it also instils confidence within the child.

• If you are posed questions regarding the environment at home and/or the relationship with your spouse, it is advisable to keep the responses diplomatic.

• If you are a single parent, you may say so without giving details of your marital status.

• If you have friends who are part of the faculty, it may be difficult for tender children to disconnect the relationship between them and an "aunty or uncle" and a teacher.

• Tell them people play different roles. So at school, the "aunty/uncle" is a teacher and the child is a student. The teacher must be addressed as 'ma'am' or 'sir' and the child will be treated like any other student.

• And when at home, the "aunty/uncle" is a friend and the child can expect the warm, familiar relationship s/he has enjoyed so far.

• Children like to boast about their proximity to their teachers / professors to the other students and this tendency needs to be curbed.

• You could pointedly indicate that the inability to keep the relationships in their respective slots may lead to them being alienated from other students and being perceived as "teacher's pets".

• Do not go out of your way to describe the nature of your relationship to all and sundry. When bumping into a friend at school, restrict the conversation to school work. It is also advisable to not flaunt your close relationship with a teacher to other parents or faculty members.

• Likewise, avoid asking questions about your child's progress and problems at school when meeting a teacher at a house party. Keep these questions for PTA meetings.

• If your child has been pulled up in class for untoward behaviour, step in only when asked. Do not take the punishment personally, or be vindictive and sever the relationship with the teacher. Understand that the deed may have been done for the betterment of the child. Leave the remedial action to the teacher.

KEEP YOUR ROOM CLEAN

2008-07-03T10:28:00.000-07:00

Children's failure to keep their rooms clean is the basis for many a family argument. However, it's not that difficult to keep your room clean. Divide room cleaning into several tasks, concentrating on one until you do it well. Then focus on a second task, and continue until the whole job is accomplished.

Be specific: Make checklist, post the list in your room and recheck off each task as it is performed. Even if a bed is not made exactly to your standards, if it looks better than it did the day before, feel happy that you have seen improvement. Recognize your achievement.

Be consistent: Some of us have a very bad habit that we keep our clean only for a few days. Then again we start ignoring the regular dusting, our study table is mess again and our so is our cabinet. We often blame our routine for this. However there is no reason why we cannot spare 10 minutes to daily dusting and making sure that things are organized in our room.

Set specific Times: Another area in which the cleanliness of a room becomes a point of discussion is time. Give yourself some time to do the job. Make sure that you do the job of cleaning the room with in the specified time.

It's my Turf: Sometimes, when our parents comment on our untidy room, we are ready with the answer, it's my room and I am fine with it, many of us would choose to be neat, but if parents say we must clean our rooms, we become stubbornly rebellious. The fact is the way you keep your room is your choice, so why not choose to life in a neat and tidy room.

The key is to keep cleaning and organizing daily. If you spend just a few minutes a day, your room will stay clean. Also, the problem is probably related to a lack of organization, so may be if you find a system for organizing your stuff that works for you (other than just throwing it on the floor) you will be more apt to maintain the system. I am sure if you ask your mom, she would be happy to help you get the materials you need to keep your room clean and organized.

When God Made Fathers

2008-07-03T09:02:00.000-07:00

When the good Lord was creating Fathers, he started with a tall frame.

A female angel nearby said, "What kind of a Father is that? If you're going to make children so close to the ground, why have you put the Father up so high? He won't be able to shoot marbles without kneeling, tuck a child in bed without bending, or even kiss a child without stooping"

God smiled and said, "Yes, but if I make him child size, who would children have to look up to?"

And when God made a Father's hands, they were large. The angel shook her head and said,"Large hands can't manage diaper pins, small buttons, rubber bands on pony tails, or even remove splinters caused from baseball bats."

Again God smiled and said, "I know, but they're large enough to hold everything a small boy empties from his pockets, yet small enough to cup a child's face in them."

Then God molded long slim legs and broad shoulders, "Do you realize you just made a Father without a lap?" The angel chuckled.

God said, "A Mother needs a lap. A Father needs strong shoulders to pull a sled, to balance a boy on a bicycle, or to hold a sleepy head on the way home from the circus."

When God was in the middle of creating the biggest feet any one had ever seen, the angel could not contain herself any longer. "That's not fair. Do you honestly think those feet are going to get out of bed early in the morning when the baby cries, or walk through a birthday party without crushing one or two of the guests?"

God again smiled and said, "They will work. You will see. They will support a small child who wants to ride to Branbury Cross or scare mice away from a summer cabin, or display shoes that will be a challenge to fill." God worked throughout the night, giving the Father few words, but a firm authoritative voice; eyes that see everything, but remain calm and tolerant.

Finally, almost as an after thought, He added tears. Then he turned to the angel and said, "Now are you satisfied he can love as much as a Mother can?"

The angel said nothing more.

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

2008-07-02T10:37:00.000-07:00

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

Rajesh married to Sunita and have a 3-year old son Ritesh. We shall see the labyrinth of interaction between the two in the descending order.

Rajesh : "Sunita, I am telling you the truth. I really had some important meeting in my office."

Sunita : "Just shut up okay. All men are the same, all are liars.

Rajesh : "I am not lying. You can ask my colleague if you want to.

Sunita : "Yeah, right ! Now I have to waste my time and energy talking to your boring ill-mannered friends of yours!"

Rajesh : "Sunita, please calm down."

Sunita : You, your parents and your immature son will not let me live my life!"

Rajesh : "Why do you always have to talk like that about my parents?"

Sunita : "Oh yes, I forgot, I forgot that you have sold off your soul to them."

Rajesh : "Sunita, please, they might hear what you are saying. Ritesh also will hear that we are fighting.

"
Sunita : "Oh yeah, so now I am fighting. You never fight at all. You are the greatest saint of the world, right? Besides, I don't care who hears it. Let them hear what I say. They must know what kind of person you are."

Rajesh : "Fine, fine, my mistake. Now please don't say anything. Just calm down. There was an important meeting and I got late."

Sunita : "Then why do you even have to come late? You should have come tomorrow directly. I am just living like a slave in this house. I have become just a pathetic housewife. And your parents are lazing around the whole day. They have nothing to do."

Rajesh : "What are you saying? Who is treating you as a slave? You can do anything you want. You said you don't want to do any housework, I agree and we hired - not one but two maid servants. You said you want to invest money in the stock market. I gave it to you but you lost everything and still I didn't say anything to you. I am still giving you money to invest in the stock market. Now what more you want me to do?"

Sunita : "Why don't you just tell your parents to leave my house? I just don't like their presence. And I also don't like Ritesh being close to them. They are going to spoil him with their ancient teachings."

Rajesh : "Sunita, it is their house. The house is not even in my name. Besides, they are not bothering you at all. And Ritesh is going to learn a lot from his grandparents."

Sunita : "Bullshit!"

Three Years earlier

Rajesh : "I don't believe you are pregnant. I am so happy. Great. I am going to be a father."

Sunita : "I am also happy. You are going to be a father."

Rajesh : "What do you think what name we should give to our son?"

Sunita : "I like Ritesh."

Rajesh : "Ritesh is okay name. I like Sunesh. Sun from Sunita and Esh from Rajesh. What do you think?"

Sunita : "That's a lousy name. I don't like that. Ritesh is the best."

Rajesh : " Okay, we will ask our parents."

Sunita : "Okay, but I know everybody will like Sunesh only. But I don't care. My son's name will be Ritesh and that's final."

Rajesh : "Okay darling. Whatever you wish."

Sunita : "I am not going to thank you for it."

Rajesh : "It is going to be so nice. Our son will play around with his grandparents."

Sunita : "Yes, Ritesh will be lucky to have his grandparents."

Rajesh : "He is going to call me daddy daddy."

Sunita : "So what ? He is going to call me mummy mummy. And you should know mummy is the best, not a father."

Rajesh : "Whatever you think Sunita."

Sunita : "What do you mean by that ? Am I wrong?"

Rajesh : "No, not at all. Mummy is stronger than the daddy, okay, happy now?"

Sunita : "Shut up and get me a glass of water, you lazy daddy."

Two Years Earlier

Sunita : "I love you Rajesh. Tell me you are never going to leave me alone."

Rajesh : "I never will. Trust me."

Sunita : "I promise I will never fight or even argue with you. Whatever you say, I will do it."

Rajesh : "And whatever you say, I will do it too."

Sunita : "Your parents are so nice. They are so experienced and so friendly. They have never treated me as an outsider. They treat me as their own daughter."

Rajesh : "I am glad you like my parents."

Sunita : "Don't worry Rajesh. I will always like and support your parents for life."

Rajesh : "Would you continue your career or would like to become a housewife?"

Sunita : "Of course a housewife. I don't want to pursue my career. I just want to take good care of my family."

Rajesh : "I mean you can surely do whatever you want to anytime. In my house there is no restriction at all."

Sunita : "I know, but I will always remain a nice housewife. Besides, being a housewife is actually a privilege and not some slavery as some women say. I will do all the housework and won't let you or your parents do any work in the house at all."

Rajesh : "I am always going to stand by you Sunita."

Sunita : "I will always love you from the bottom of my heart. I will never hurt you. Never."

Well, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. You decide which one is which.

I think Marriage institution is Good.
What we make out of Marriage is Bad.
And our ignorance and mistakes are Ugly.

Coaching Boys into Men

2008-07-02T10:02:00.000-07:00

What you Can Do

The boys in your life need your time and energy. Your son, grandson, nephew, younger brother. The boys you teach, coach and mentor. All need you to help them grow into healthy young men.

Boys are swamped with influences outside of the home – from friends, the neighborhood, television, the internet, music, the movies… everything they see around them. They hear all kinds of messages about what it means to "be a man" – that they have to be tough and in control. There are numerous conflicting and some harmful messages being given to boys about what constitutes "being a man" in a relationship.

Boys need your advice on how to behave toward girls. Boys are watching how you and other men relate to women to figure out their own stance towards girls. So teach boys early, and teach them often, that there is no place for violence in a relationship.

Here's How:

Teach Early. It's never too soon to talk to a child about violence. Let him know how you think he should express his anger and frustration – and what is out of bounds. Talk with him about what it means to be fair, share and treat others with respect.

Be there. If it comes down to one thing you can do, this is it. Just being with boys is crucial. The time doesn't have to be spent in activities. Boys will probably not say this directly -- but they want a male presence around them, even if few words are exchanged.

Listen. Hear what he has to say. Listen to how he and his friends talk about girls. Ask him if he's ever seen abusive behavior in his friends. Is he worried about any of his friends who are being hurt in their relationships? Are any of his friends hurting anyone else?

Tell Him How. Teach him ways to express his anger without using violence. When he gets mad, tell him he can walk it out, talk it out, or take a time out. Let him know he can always come to you if he feels like things are getting out of hand. Try to give him examples of what you might say or do in situations that could turn violent.

Bring it up. A kid will never approach you and ask for guidance on how to treat women. But that doesn't mean he doesn't need it. Try watching TV with him or listening to his music. If you see or hear things that depict violence against women, tell him what you think about it. Never hesitate to let him know you don't approve of sports figures that demean women, or jokes, video games and song lyrics that do the same. And when it comes time for dating, be sure he knows that treating girls with respect is important.

Be a Role Model. Fathers, coaches and any man who spends time with boys or teens will have the greatest impact when they "walk the walk." They will learn what respect means by observing how you treat other people. So make respect a permanent way of dealing with people – when you're driving in traffic, talking with customer service reps, in restaurants with waiters, and with your family around the dinner table. He's watching what you say and do and takes his cues from you, both good and bad. Be aware of how you express your anger. Let him know how you define a healthy relationship and always treat women and girls in a way that your son can admire.

Teach Often. Your job isn't done once you get the first talk out of the way. Help him work through problems in relationships as they arise. Let him know he can come back and talk to you again anytime. Use every opportunity to reinforce the message that violence has no place in a relationship.

HELP KIDS SLEEP ALL NIGHT

2008-07-01T09:42:00.001-07:00

HELP KIDS SLEEP ALL NIGHT

An astounding seven out of 10 children aren't getting enough z's. Here, five top children's sleep-stealers, plus smart strategies that ensure sound slumber for them — and for you.

You tuck your kids into bed with a kiss and a prayer...that they'll drift off quickly and sleep through the night (so you can too!). Sadly, those z's don't always come easy: Nearly 70 percent of kids under age 10 experience some type of sleep problem, according to the National Sleep Foundation. And although sleep needs naturally decrease by about 15 minutes on average every year (1-year-olds require almost 14 hours daily, while a 17-year-old needs at least 8.25 hours), a startling 80 percent of kids ages 11 to 17 get less than the recommended amount, and 54 percent of 17-year-olds don't get to bed before 11 p.m.

Unfortunately, lost sleep can do more than just leave kids groggy and grumpy. Studies show that children who are sleep-deprived are more likely to be depressed, to catch colds and flu, and to suffer accidents on the playground. Just one hour less of sleep a night causes measurable memory and concentration problems. Behavioral problems, such as whining and short tempers, also shoot up. In fact, the frenzied energy and lack of focus in some sleep-challenged kids is often mistaken for attention-

deficit/hyperactivity disorder. And those who get less than 10 hours a night are three times more likely to be obese than those getting 12 or more, putting them at higher risk of diabetes and other weight-related conditions.

The good news: Sleep problems in kids are easily prevented and treated, experts say. You can help the entire family get more rest by addressing these major roadblocks to a good night's sleep.

Overscheduling

Participation in too many after-school activities can get kids amped up, pushing back dinnertime, homework time—and bedtime. Compared to 1981, now the average kid has almost two hours less of unstructured time each day. Instead, they spend twice as much time in structured competitive sports, while good old-fashioned outdoor play—the running, jumping, and catch-playing that reduces stress and helps them sleep at night—has dropped by more than half. A rule of thumb: "If your kid never says, 'I'm bored,' he's overscheduled," says child psychologist Jodi A. Mindell, Ph.D., coauthor of Take Charge of Your Child's Sleep and associate director of the Sleep Center at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia. "Sit down with your child and tell him, 'You're allowed to do two things this season: one sport and another activity. Which will it be?'"

Too Much Technology

Sneaky Caffeine

Even just one caffeinated drink a day robs children of half an hour of sleep each night—another reason to monitor your child's intake of sugar-laden sodas. But caffeine can lurk in lots of surprising places, including bottled teas, chocolate, and coffee-flavored ice cream. Hefty amounts can also be found in over-the-counter medications such as Anacin, Excedrin, and Dristan, so scan the active and inactive ingredients lists for caffeine before you give your child one of these meds. And check drink and protein bar labels for guarana, a common herbal stimulant.

Nightmares

Bad dreams are often triggered by real-life events that frighten kids, including immunizations, being left alone, or accidents—not to mention the scary impressions left by a few minutes of the nightly news report. "Nightmares are actually good for a child. They're a way to process and make sense of both real and imaginary fears, which enables him to deal with them better in his waking life," says pediatrician Alan Greene, M.D., author of From First Kicks to First Steps and a clinical assistant professor at Stanford University. "If a nightmare wakes him up, your best approach is to comfort him and tuck him back into bed, then give him the opportunity the next day to draw pictures or tell stories to work through the underlying issues."

If your child screams, moans, or thrashes wildly in the middle of the night, and is glassy-eyed and unresponsive when you try to console him, he is probably having night terrors. As distressing as his behavior is for you to witness, it's simply a sign that he's stuck between two stages of non-REM sleep. He won't even remember the event the next morning, so it's better left unmentioned. Night terrors often occur when a child is potty training or overtired, so try leading him to the bathroom or letting him sleep a little longer in the mornings or during naps.

A Hidden Health Concern

If your child snores heavily off and on, thrashes about in bed, and awakens frequently, her struggles with sleeping may signal an underlying health condition that requires attention. "Probably 60 percent of children brought to our clinic have sleep issues related to a physical reason," says Mindell. One common culprit: sleep apnea, a condition characterized by temporary breathing disruptions during slumber. Childhood cases have skyrocketed by 436 percent in the past 20 years, largely because the number of overweight children has tripled to 16 percent in the same period (excess fatty tissue in the throat can block airways).

Other sneaky sleep-stealers include respiratory problems such as asthma and allergies, as well as restless legs syndrome (a neurological disorder characterized by an uncontrollable urge to move your legs when they're at rest) and narcolepsy (a sleep disorder marked by brief "sleep attacks" that come on during the day). If lifestyle changes such as nixing caffeine or moving the TV don't solve your little one's sleeplessness within two to four weeks, see your pediatrician or visit one of 2,000 sleep clinics nationwide to get the proper diagnosis and treatment. For a sleep clinic in your area, log on to sleepcenters.org. Getting to the root of the problem will help you and your child rest easy.