Being "In Control"

Being "In Control" — The Possible and Impossible in Parenting

Parents are expected to stay "in control" of their lives, their children, and themselves. Some major parts of this expectation are impossible to fulfill! But because there is no way to learn parenting skills and truths ahead of time, we parents struggle and worry when we don't seem to be "in control," or when being "in control" means being harsh with our children. Let's first outline the things no parent can fully control.

We don't have full control over our lives. Hard things can happen to us and to our children, and societal oppressions can force us into inhuman circumstances. There are things we can do to try to keep our families healthy, but we don't have full control there. There are things we can do to be able to pay our bills, but job security and earning worthy wages for working class jobs are not things we alone have the power to determine. We work at building good relationships, but many of us don't begin with the tools, support, information, or time to solve critical relationship problems. We are also up against racism, drugs, violence, and harshness on the schoolyards and the streets. By ourselves, we and our children are vulnerable to hurt and unforeseen difficulties. To blame ourselves for lack of control makes no sense. The influence we can have when we face these oppression-based or health-based hard times lies in our ability to organize with others to do what's necessary, WITH LOTS OF HELP.
We don't have control over our children's behavior. We do have deep influence on them. How we love, cherish, and treat our children affects them moment by moment, and for the rest of their lives. But our influence doesn't mean that we can exert control over how they behave and feel. Nor does it mean that a child whose behavior is difficult comes from a parent who is not trying hard enough, or is not doing the right things. Our children are subject to difficulties because of circumstances beyond our control--their health, accidents, unforeseen encounters with people who don't care for them well, enormous stress on us, frightening incidents that couldn't be anticipated. When children are hurt by these kinds of circumstances, their behavior does reflect their fears, and they may be perceived as "difficult." But this is not the parents' fault! What's more, this "off track" behavior is a necessary signal that the child gives that she's been wounded and needs attention. As difficult as their behavior may be, we parents can be grateful that our children refuse to suffer silently when they feel too isolated or frightened or angry to think.
In the short run, we sometimes don't have control over our own behavior. It's one of the great shocks of parenting to find ourselves yelling at or hurting our beloved children, when we never ever intended to do so. There are things they do that drive us nuts--whining, making messes, fighting with each other, using street language, "talking back" when we're trying to gain control. We each have our personal thresholds, past which lose power over our own behavior. Usually, we become very like our own parents when they were lost in reaction.
Finally, we don't have full control over how other people feel about us or our children. We parents try hard to get our children to meet some unwritten standard of conformity, hoping that if they "act right," people will like them. In fact, we live in a society in which grownups are taught to see children as "trouble," "a problem," "extra work," "in the way," and more. This training is widespread, and no matter how fully a child may conform, those attitudes lie under the surface in many people, waiting to be triggered. We as parents need to decide, on our children's behalf, not to attack our children to please grownups who only accept children if they act like little adults. Even a child's best behavior can't cure that kind of hostile attitude. So if your child is having a healthy tantrum in front of a relative who is loudly demanding that you be harsh to her, you can simply move to a back bedroom to handle the situation, taking the time you need. Being harsh to your child on someone else's demand won't help your self-respect, it won't change that grownup's bias against your child, and it sets you against the child you love dearly.

The Goal of Being a Learner

I think goals that we parents can reasonably set for ourselves are:

To enjoy our children
To learn something every day
To treat ourselves and our children like learners.

Story time kids...

Once up on a time there was a small town in a beautiful country called India.

In that town there were these two kids named AN and AS. Both were known in their community for their intelligence and good behaviour.

But there is a dark secret. Both had a peculiar and weird problem, one among them (AN) used to mingle with all other members of the community but still would feel "Alone in my own world".

The other (AS) almost lived in his own world and always think about things that are not happening in his life. These two felt it is biggest problem anyone can have in this world.

One day both these met in school and discussed their problems and felt its time for them to find the solution.

They heard their friends discussing about a fairy in near by jungle who is kind to people and fulfils the wishes of good people.

Once their exams were over they went to jungle to look for the fairy. After roaming around for a few hours they found fairy. Fairy had a look at these boys and asked them what they were doing in the jungle.

AN said "O my kind fairy! Please hear my problem which is the most gruesome trouble in this whole world. I'm a loner and always feel that I have nobody who can care about me. I always feel I have less money (and this boy has hugeeeeeeeee property, mobiles which he changes 4 times a year, a bike and a car) .Please help me "

Fairy patiently listened to him. And then it was AS's turn. He starts " O dear fairy! Don't listen to AN. I'm sure you would feel my problem is the worst in the world when you hear mine. I'm fed up and have no time to look around other beautiful things in the world. I'm the only person who seems to be working and have no one to say hi or talk to me lovingly and also nobody has time to talk to me. Also I'm carzy for bikes and always confused on what to buy. Please help me".

Fairy clearly knew these kids need good counselling and starts telling them to spend some time with their family n friends in community.

We know kids right ? They never listen. And they thought this fairy is not sounding right and termed her too as a kid. That's it Fairy got soooo angry that she cursed both of them that they would always remain kids their whole life. And even after 15-20 years AS and AN remained kids forever.

8 lies of a mother!

This story begins when I was a child: I was born poor. Often we hadn't enough to eat. Whenever we had some food, Mother often gave me her portion of rice. While she was transferring her rice into my bowl, she would say 'Eat this rice, son! I'm not hungry.'
This was Mother's First Lie.

As I grew, Mother gave up her spare time to fish in a river near our house; she hoped that from the fish she caught, she could give me a little bit more nutritious food for my growth. Once she had caught just two fish, she would make fish soup. While I was eating the soup, mother would sit beside me and eat what was still left on the bone of the fish I had eaten; My heart was touched when I saw it. Once I gave the other fish to her on my chopstick but she immediately refused it and said, 'Eat this fish, son! I don't really like fish.'
This was Mother's Second Lie.

Then, in order to fund my education, Mother went to a Match Factory to bring home some used matchboxes which she filled with fresh matchsticks. This helped her get some money to cover our needs. One wintry night I awoke to find Mother filling the matchboxes by candlelight. So I said, 'Mother, go to sleep; it's late: you can continue working tomorrow morning.' Mother smiled and said 'Go to sleep, son! I'm not tired.'
This was Mother's Third Lie
When I had to sit my Final Examination, Mother accompanied me. After dawn, Mother waited for me for hours in the heat of the sun. When the bell rang, I ran to meet her. Mother embraced me and poured me a glass of tea that she had prepared in a thermos. The tea was not as strong as my Mother's love, Seeing Mother covered with perspiration; I at once gave her my glass and asked her to drink too. Mother said 'Drink, son! I'm not thirsty!â¦£8364;
This was Mother's Fourth Lie.
After Father's death, Mother had to play the role of a single parent. She held on to her former job; she had to fund our needs alone. Our family's life was more complicated. We suffered from starvation. Seeing our family's condition worsening, my kind Uncle who lived near my house came to help us solve our problems big and small. Our other neighbors saw that we were poverty stricken so they often advised my mother to marry again. But Mother refused to remarry saying 'I don't need love.'
This was Mother's Fifth Lie.

After I had finished my studies and gotten a job, it was time for my old Mother to retire but she carried on going to the market every morning just to sell a few vegetables. I kept sending her money but she was steadfast and even sent the money back to me. She said, 'I have enough money.'
That was Mother's Sixth Lie.

I continued my part-time studies for my Master's Degree. Funded by the American Corporation for which I worked, I succeeded in my studies. With a big jump in my salary, I decided to bring Mother to enjoy life in America but Mother didn't want to bother her son; she said to me 'I'm not used to high living.'
That was Mother's Seventh Lie

In her dotage, Mother was attacked by cancer and had to be hospitalized. Now living far across the ocean, I went home to visit Mother who was bedridden after an operation. Mother tried to smile but I was heartbroken because she was so thin and feeble but Mother said, 'Don't cry, son! I'm not in pain.'
That was Mother's Eighth Lie.

Telling me this, her eighth lie, she died.
YES, MOTHER WAS AN ANGEL!

M - O - T - H - E - R
'M' is for the Million things she gave me, 'O' means Only that she's growing old, 'T' is for the Tears she shed to save me, 'H' is for her Heart of gold,
'E' is for her Eyes with love-light shining in them,
'R' means Right, and right she'll always be,
Put them all together, they spell 'MOTHER' a word that means the world to me.
For those of you who are lucky to be still blessed with your Mom's presence on Earth, this story is beautiful. For those who aren't so blessed, this is even more beautiful.

WHEN MATHEMATICS

When Mathematics 'zeros in' on the truth

Consider this and you are bound to marvel...

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321

1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111

9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888

Brilliant, isn't it?

And look at this symmetry:

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111=123456789 87654321

Now, take a look at this...

101%

From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:

What Equals 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been in situations where someone wants you to GIVE OVER
100%.

How about ACHIEVING 101%?

What equals 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help answer these
questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

If:

H-A-R-D-W-O- R- K

8+1+18+4+23+ 15+18+11 = 98%

And:

K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E

11+14+15+23+ 12+5+4+7+ 5 = 96%

But:

A-T-T-I-T-U- D-E

1+20+20+9+20+ 21+4+5 = 100%

THEN, look how far the love of God will take you:

L-O-V-E-O-F- G-O-D

12+15+22+5+15+ 6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:

While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will
get you there, It's the Love of God that will put you over the top!

Worshipping "an infinite God",

Your Guide To Getting the Best Easter Gifts

Easter is the time to spend with friends and family, a great time to celebrate the new spring season and the renewal of life everywhere after winter's chill. It's also the time when godparents, grandparents, and family friends get to do some of their best gift-giving.

Presented below are several ways to find the right Easter gift for the child in your life. Easter gifts are meant to represent an aesthetic that's lovely without being showy, and meaningful without being sentimental. Like the finest clothes worn to Sunday services, the best Easter gift shows class without showing itself off.

Understand that Easter is not "Springtime Christmas"

Some parents and family friends misunderstand the meaning of Easter gifts, essentially confusing the Easter season as a kind of ancillary Christmas. The right Easter gift communicates the best wishes for spring and summer, the seasons of rebirth and renewal. By contrast, Christmas is more sentimental and nostalgic in nature.

Easter is also a more formal occasion than Christmas. For Christians, it celebrates Christ's rebirth and the verification of his teachings and prophecy. On a secular level, it also commemorates the sense of new life. It's no coincidence that the colors of spring - soft pastels of green, blue, yellow, and white - are often the colors of a baby nursery.

Finding the right Easter gift with the right message.

Giving the right Easter gift also depends on a certain extent on the etiquette and place of the gift-giver. For example, grandparents are ideally allowed to give much greater and elaborate gifts than godparents.

To give an overly elaborate gift seems showy and, to a certain extent, selfish. (As if the givers are calling attention to themselves.) But giving something too small will seem tacky.

Parents and grandparents should plan to give anything they like. Godparents and siblings of the parents can give clothing ensembles or keepsakes for the baby or the nursery. Family friends and others should plan to give smaller gifts, such as a single item of clothing or a decoration for the nursery.

How to gift wrap and present the Easter gift.

Presents can be given to the family any time up to Easter Sunday, but should be opened that Sunday. As a matter of taste, gifts should not be exchanged on Good Friday.

There's no set etiquette for the gift-wrap or presentation. Most will want to choose gift-wrapping in a color scheme that fits the season. Personalized gifts might also include a keepsake gift box or container.

Students need to eat right

‘Students need to eat right’

Students should follow a balanced diet to feed their minds during exams, advises of senior dieticians at AIIMS

STUDENTS face a lot of stress when their examinations are around the corner. Parental support and following a fixed routine for one's studies are the things that many students keep in mind to cope with stress. But it is also important to pay attention to what you eat during examinations, as consuming the wrong type of food can have adverse effects. It is also important to neither over nor under eat, as all these things directly affect the brain's functioning. A healthy and nutritious diet can also help in fighting stress. Here are a few dietary measures that may prove beneficial:
   Have a balanced diet: Foods rich in carbohydrates, proteins, vitamins and minerals should be included in the diet. Carbohydrates are something we often avoid, but if you go in for complex carbohydrates like whole cereals, wheat and ragi, in place of refined carbohydrates like Maida, it will help in keeping your brain alert.
   Consume small meals: Instead of bulky meals, five to six small feedings should be encouraged as this practice keeps blood sugar and energy levels steady.
   Avoid tea and coffee: High-energy foods like coffee, tea, aerated drinks and chocolates should be avoided because they provide instant energy that wears out soon. Almonds, walnuts and boiled legumes (channa) are good long-term energy sources.
   Don't skip breakfast: Past research shows that students who eat breakfast have much better concentration and memory recall than those who skip breakfast. Do not take memory pills: Some students consume them to help grasp syllabus. This can prove fatal to their health in the long run.
   Drink lots of water: When there is so much of activity in the brain the body is prone to dehydration. So drink a lot of water. In addition, water helps to digest all the food and leads to a high metabolic rate, which is beneficial for students.

DIET PLAN

Breakfast:

Two to four dates (on waking up), one glass of health drink like Horlicks plus one beetroot + one carrot + one orange + tomato juice, five-eight almonds, one toast (whole wheat bread) or sandwich, one egg.

Lunch:

Two soya + wheat chapattis (1:1 proportion), sprouts - one cup curd - one cup + two spoons of white til (without skin), vegetables and fresh salad.

Tea:

One cup Horlicks + five-eight almonds + eight-10 black raisins

Dinner:

Brown rice or two soya + wheat chappatis (1:1 proportion), Dal or fish, vegetables + fresh salad.

Education for the special kind

Education for the special kind

Every child needs and deserves good living conditions. Education is one of the most required entities to survive on. School is like a second home. What if the second home treats you like a stranger? What if it treats you like an unwanted piece of non-existence? In many schools, this is the bare reality. Our system of education is now limited to the arenas of intelligence and good appearance. Any handicap, be it mental or physical restricts a child from merging into the mainstream. Why is it so? A volunteer with CRY seen the case studies of such children and mentioned that they do not know what to expect from their adults for they do nothing but separate them from others.

It is funny but our government has made rules regarding the inclusion of these handicapped children. The children can study in normal schools and do not need to go to special schools. These children are often neglected and not provided with required help. When asked about the same, the authorities trail off by dismissing them as "special children" who need to go to special schools. But the reality is that these special schools are often very expensive. A social organization or a NGO might not be able to provide the appropriate education needed. They might provide some vocational training. The government has thought of making ramps in schools but the question is that-is the society ready to accept the intermingling of them with the other children? It is time we think for them and think with our hearts and not our minds.

HEIGHT / WEIGHT CHART-Boys & Girls

HEIGHT / WEIGHT CHART

Average height and weight of boys at different ages

AGE	WEIGHT (kg)	HEIGHT (cm)
Birth	3.3	50.5
3 months	6.0	61.1
6 months	7.8	67.8
9 months	9.2	72.3
1 year	10.2	76.1
2 years	12.3	85.6
3 years	14.6	94.9
4 years	16.7	102.9
5 years	18.7	109.9
6 years	20.7	116.1
7 years	22.9	121.7
8 years	25.3	127.0
9 years	28.1	132.2
10 years	31.4	137.5
11 years	32.2	140.0
12 years	37.0	147.0
13 years	40.9	153.0
14 years	47.0	160.0
15 years	52.6	166.0
16 years	58.0	171.0
17 years	62.7	175.0
18 years	65.0	177.0

(Source: Nutrient Requirements and Recommended Dietary Allowances for Indians, I.C.M.R. 1990.)

Average height and weight of girls at different ages

AGE	WEIGHT (kg)	HEIGHT (cm)
Birth	3.2	49.9
3 months	5.4	60.2
6 months	7.2	66.6
9 months	8.6	71.1
1 year	9.5	75.0
2 years	11.8	84.5
3 years	14.1	93.9
4 years	16.0	101.6
5 years	17.7	108.4
6 years	19.5	114.6
7 years	21.8	120.6
8 years	24.8	126.4
9 years	28.5	132.2
10 years	32.5	138.3
11 years	33.7	142.0
12 years	38.7	148.0
13 years	44.0	150.0
14 years	48.0	155.0
15 years	51.5	161.0
16 years	53.0	162.0
17 years	54.0	163.0
18 years	54.4	164.0

Height & Weight Pattern in the Growing Baby

Expected weight gain

You need to understand the importance of the role of weight gain, and therefore of your baby's expected or ideal weight. The baby's birth weight is the starting point for growth. Whatever be the birth weight, the growth rate in all the babies is approximately the same. The overall growth pattern depends on the proper food and adequate care of the baby. However illness, starvation, serious neglect or emotional disturbances would make his weight gain dip downwards.

Height or length of the baby matters too

Weight gain is not the only way to assess a baby's growth. Children are not meant to get fatter and fatter, but bigger overall. Getting taller is also included in the growth pattern of the baby. The baby's length will change much more slowly than the weight. Whatever be the baby's length at birth, approximately 2 cm (3/4") will be gained each month or just over 5 cm (2") in 3 months.

Just as there is expected weight gain for a baby of any age, related to the birth weight, so there is a expected length at any age, related to the birth-length. There is a consistent relationship of weight and height in the normal growth pattern of the child.

Exception to normal growth patterns
a.	Pre-term babies : They are very slow to get started on their feeding, and therefore their growing. The weight tends to remain in low position for a long time
b.	Small - for date babies : They make startling growth during their earlier weeks, but on the whole they tend to occupy still a low position on the normal growth graph
c.	Babies who are ill immediately after birth or in the first weeks : These babies fail to start gaining weight or may actually loose some. Excellent care may lead to a spurt of "catch-up growth", so that the baby's personal growth curve shifts upwards towards the normal
d.	Babies who are bottle-fed from birth : These babies may loose no weight in the first days. They may gain very fast in the first days. They may gain very fast from the beginning, which also depends upon the formula food given. An even greater rise occurs in the babies weight when solids are added in addition to the over-concentrated milk. A baby who is gaining weight faster than nature intended, will not gain length to match it. There is a obvious disparity in the height gain compared to the weight. This cue should make you realise that the baby is starting to get obese rather than simply growing larger

MYTHS OF FATHERHOOD

Myth No. 1 : Newborn's do not really need fathers

False

The intense connection between the mother and child during breastfeeding may leave you wondering whether he really needs you. Yes he does !

Rather research has shown that father who are given unrestricted contact with their children after birth will raise their children in a more constructive way. The children turn out to be far more confident than others. Paternal bonding is as important as maternal bonding. Very often birth of a baby helps a man to express and enjoy emotions that society primes him to repress.

You can help feed your baby if your partner expresses milk into a bottle. You can help change the diapers too. Touch too helps a lot in bonding you can ease off a bit of your spouses workload. Remember, you make a difference to the whole family.

Myth No.2 : Only expectant mother feelings are important

False

Your partner needs to hear your feelings. Do not feel ashamed or shy to express them. Research has shown that if men are involved from the moment pregnancy is confirmed. They become active and enthusiastic fathers. There is no greater help to a pregnant women than an interested to sympathetic partner. There is no better help with a newborn baby than an active, passionate dad. The labour itself can be just as remarkable an experience for the fathers. Give yourself permission to express both your feelings of vulnerability and excitement.

Myth No.3 : Men do not know to take care of young children

False

There is no such word as do not or cannot in the father's dictionary. If you make a sincere attempt, you would definitely be able to take an active and positive role in your child's life. In the USA, there are so many working mothers and the fathers take care of the child. It depends on the kind of relationship that you build with your child . If you spend time with your baby you will become sensitive to his needs.

Myth No.4 : Men who focus on their children cannot be successful businessmen.

False

Previously, it used to be said that men who make sacrifices and chose family over career advancement do it since they cannot succeed at work - It was no longer believed so. Rather today's man has realised the value of spending time with his family. They feel being a good father is a significant accomplishment as being a successful business man.

VALUES - THE GREATEST ASSET OF YOUR CHILD

As we may have often realized, all human beings belong to a community and we all live in society. We do not live in isolation and various societal rules and norms may govern our behavior. The fundamental basics of social responsibility start in your very own home. Simple elements of good behavior e.g. each person takes care of his own belongings and is responsible for them should be taught at home.

We should never consider our children incapable or too young to learn about the concept of communities and society. Be it at home or in school, children are always going to be involved in some sort of social circle or the other. We must inculcate a strong sense of social consciousness in our children from as early an age as possible. This will enable our child to become a better person and a more accepted and valued member of society. Children accept and learn the most in their early childhood. Perceptions and beliefs are shaped by the age of 5-6. Therefore it is vitally essential to instill these social values in our children from early childhood. The most important thing that a child must be taught is responsibility. Be it responsibility for other people, our belongings or even others feelings as well as their own actions. It is never too early to inculcate such social values in your child. A child's interaction with family and friends teaches him rules, duties, responsibilities and the right course of action. Social values affect and shape the way in which your child will interact with others. Values like integrity, honesty, sensitivity, courage, loyalty and respect for others helps your child become a better person as well as an ideal citizen. As you all know, children learn the fastest by watching others, especially their own parents. If you as a parent practice good social behavior your child will automatically watch and learn from you. When you tell a child what is right and then when he sees it being practiced in his own home, such mannerism and behavior is firmly imprinted in him. You must teach your child to act appropriately in public places. Small things like picking up litter and throwing it in the bin or not plucking flowers from a garden greatly add to the magnanimity of your child's personality.

HOW TO INTRODUCE CHILDREN TO MONEY

Children can be introduced to money as soon as they learn to count. For eg: Instead of giving a ten-rupee note to children, 10 one-rupee coins can be given to them. Without realizing, the child will learn about money. Another simple way could be to give a money abacus to children – which have rupee denominations. While learning to count, toddlers will get initiated into the world of money. Once children are 6-7 years old, they can be explained details through money games. Gift children the game of monopoly and regularly play the same with them. It will introduce them to the world of money in a fun manner. Parents can start talking about money to children explicitly once they are old enough to start asking for regular money to spend either at school or with friends. Often, parents feel pressurized to give pocket money to their children since children from other families get the same. However, the format in which money is given need not necessarily be ‘pocket money’; it could be on need – basis as long as it is closely monitored & is in limited amounts. There are several other ways in which parents can teach their children about money:
*	Parents can gift a 'piggy bank' to children and ask them to collect all the money that they get as gifts, prizes, etc. The child will be very excited with the thought of having 'his/her own money' and will also passively learn the concept of 'saving'.
*	Children can be read bed-time stories about barter i.e. how in earlier times, money did not exist and people used to exchange goods between one another to fulfil their needs. For eg: if I had an egg and wanted an orange, which someone else had, the two could be exchanged in return for each other. However as people evolved, their needs grew bigger and the system of barter stopped suiting. This is when money came into being. Money gave freedom to people to buy whatever they wanted in exchange for money.
*	Children stories can also revolve around the various formats of money & how it differs across different countries.
*	Children can be give a certain amount of fixed pocket money to take care of some of their expenses which can be defined by the parents. For eg: If your daughter/ son likes to buy candies at school randomly as well as story books/ comics regularly and you wish to control the same, advise them to use their pocket money for these purposes and ensure that they do not spend the entire amount in one go!
*	Take the children to a super market kind of place and ask them to pick up things that are of interest to them. Once they have indulged in picking the goods of their choice, explain to them how they should compare prices of goods before taking a decision. For eg: if your daughter has picked up two different kinds of pencil boxes with similar features and prices differ, explain the benefit of the pencil box and convince her to take the cheaper pencil box. However, remember to not impose the decision on her without adequate convincing else you will return home with a wailing child!
*	Once the child starts going to school, parents can open a savings account in the name of the child. Some banks in India now have a specially designed banking package for children. Eg: the Citibank Junior package. Parents can regularly put in some amount of money in the child's account. Whenever the child will get account statements, he/she will be extremely excited to get a letter in his/her name. Through the statement, parents can easily explain the concept of interest to children.
*	Ask children to draw & paint what they want to become in the future. Discuss plans on what all is required to ensure that children achieve their dreams. For eg: if your son says that he want to do an MBA in the US, you can discuss how he needs to excel in his academics from the beginning as well as extra-curricular activities so that he can be a contender to the prestigious scholarships for these institutions. He may not realize why you are discussing the same with him at that tender age, but as he grows, he will slowly start appreciating what you had discussed with him. Not only will he understand that these institutions are expensive and scholarship is essential, but it will also drive him to excel in his curriculum.

Eight Lies of a Mother

EIGHT LIES OF A MOTHER

After Father's death, Mother had to play the role of a single parent. She held on to her former job; she had to fund our needs alone. Our family's life was more complicated. We suffered from starvation. Seeing our family's condition worsening, my kind Uncle who lived near my house came to help us solve our problems, big and small. Our other neighbors saw that we were poverty stricken so they often advised my mother to marry again. But Mother refused to remarry saying 'I don't need love.' This was Mother's Fifth Lie.

After I had finished my studies and gotten a job, it was time for my old Mother to retire but she carried on going to the market every morning just to sell a few vegetables. I kept sending her money but she was steadfast and even sent the money back to me. She said, 'I have enough money.' That was Mother's Sixth Lie.

I continued my part-time studies for my Master's Degree. Funded by the American Corporation for which I worked, I succeeded in my studies. With a big jump in my salary, I decided to bring Mother to enjoy life in America but Mother didn't want to bother her son; she said to me 'I'm not used to high living.' That was Mother's Seventh Lie.

In her dotage, Mother was attacked by cancer and had to be hospitalized. Now living far across the ocean, I went home to visit Mother who was bedridden after an operation. Mother tried to smile but I was heartbroken because she was so thin and feeble but Mother said, 'Don't cry, son! I'm not in pain.' That was Mother's Eighth Lie.

Telling me this, her eighth lie, she died.

YES, MOTHER WAS AN ANGEL!

M - O - T - H - E - R

'M' is for the Million things she gave me,

'O' means Only that she's growing old,

'T' is for the Tears she shed to save me,

'H' is for her Heart of gold,

'E' is for her Eyes with love-light shining in them,

'R' means Right, and right she'll always be, Put them all together, they spell 'MOTHER' a word that means the world to me.

For those of you who are lucky to be still blessed with your Mom's presence on Earth, this story is beautiful. For those who aren't so blessed, this is even more beautiful.

                            'ON THIS EARTH THERE IS NOTHING GREATER THEN MOTHER
                          MOTHER IS SUPREME IN SACRIFICING FOR CHILDREN AND FAMILY
                                    WITHOUT MOTHER THERE IS NO HOME - NO LIFE
                                         MOTHER IS PROVIDER OF EVERYTHING

                                     NEVER HURT OR GIVE PAIN TO YOUR MOTHER
                                        ALWAYS RESPECT AND HONOUR MOTHER
                                                   MOTHER IS IRREPLACEABLE

                              MOTHER IS GOD'

Parenting